Birthday card from my mother.

Hi @Powderfinger ,

Thank you for posting. I hear you and I know that things are very difficult for you at the moment.

I acknowledge your strength in being able to reach out.

I hope things will eventually fall into place for you.

Only last year, while on a family chat, my sister msgd 'Happy Birthday' to me. My mother responded - 'Who's birthday?' - and no, my mother does NOT have dementia or memory loss.

All I can say is, your mother is thinking about you.

Im here if you need a chat.

Hugs, BPDSurvivor

Thanks for sharing, a lot of pain. I lost my mother after 3 years as a dementia carer, very stressful and sad.

@Powderfinger I am truly sorry that you are going through such a tough time. I could say 'lately' but it seems to be ongoing. You must be feeling frazzled.

I am sorry, also, that you have such a painful relationship with your mother. We only get one set of parents and sibs, and those relationships can be so destructive. How I wish it wasn't so. I can feel your hurt. Your mother thought of you on your birthday. That tells me that she thinks of you at other times, too. Don't think otherwise. To be honest, I think you think of her too. It's difficult not to. Family are part of who we are. Perhaps you wish it all wasn't so difficult and so painful. I don't know what has happened between you. I truly wish I could make it better. I don't have a relationship with my daughters and it hurts. I miss them so much. I don't know how to fix it either.

If you want to reply, please be kind. I'm very low at the moment.

I send my best wishes to you, @Powderfinger. Be kind to yourself. 😊

Hello, my name is Mara, I have a 24 year old daughter, I lost my husband to suicide when my daughter was 3, I guess I took it out on my baby with unkind behaviour, but during the past 5 years I have been doing everything for her, she has decided not to converse with me via voice, but being her Mother I know our Love will never fade and no man can replace this amazing connection, you are a gift to your Mum, please don't give up on her, I will pray that God will give you peace, Godbless you.

Hey @Powderfinger

I feel for you and I'm sorry your mum is treating you like this.
my parents stopped talking to me for 4 years after telling them if my childhood abuse. It was my dads birthday so I posted a card and present. It got sent back to me. Boy was I hurt and I'll never forget how my mum treated me.

I can't understand why parents have to be like this because the pain on their children is horribly painful.

sending you lots of hugs

ps. Happy belated birthday xxxooo

I would have felt guttered @BlueBay . I don't think I could cope with such rejection. You are one mighty strong person @BlueBay ! I admire your resilience and strength!

And @Maritza , thank you for sharing your story. I appreciate your post immensely. It must be so difficult, yet you can still reach out to others. Thank you.

Thanks @BPDSurvivor i was guttered for a very long time. I'm pretty sure it was my mum's doing. I could never see my dad doing something so horrible.
I was hospitalised a few times over the four years while not talking or seeing my dad.

@Owen45

All I can say is I give you a big hug. Words are hard for me at the moment.

@Historylover

34 years of abuse happened. I couldn't take anymore. At this point, thinking of me isn't enough to go some way in healing any of the abuse. Change is what is needed. I lost complete hope. I do think of her at times. When I do, all I feel is pain and deep hurt. All I feel is that if I make contact there is a possibility I can open myself up for more abuse and hurt. It is deeply sad. I can't risk it. I walked away because I said no more abuse. I was done and I'm still done.

To me, what would require me reconsidering is much more effort on her part to reach out, make amends full time, not just part time and consistency in her treating me much better, zero abuse of any kind and ownerships responsibility for her own actions and choices she made and continues to make. It's a sad reality to say I just have no trust. It's also sad to say that Imkstky just think of keeping myself safe mentally, emotionally and psychologically cause I cant take anymore abuse nor anymore trauma.

The reason that she is my mother is not enough. It's just not enough.