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Fear

Fear

Last fortnight we spoke about anger. We used the emotion wheel to help us explore how we feel anger, spoke about how anger shows up in our lives, and some of the ways that we cope when anger surfaces.

This fortnight, we are continuing the discussion of emotions by exploring our next emotion; fear. This is the orange section of the wheel:

Fear has an important role to play in keeping us safe and well. It’s an emotion that brings a strong bodily reaction and helps us to navigate many different situations in our lives. When we think about fear, ways we might describe the feeling of fear include “I feel scared”, “I feel anxious”, “I am overwhelmed” “I feel stressed” “I feel threatened” .

It’s our body’s inbuilt emotional barometer of how safe we feel.

Feeling fear

This emotion might be felt in different ways to other emotions, such as anger, and can impact many different systems in our body. Fear also might be associated with different behaviours. For example: when we feel fear, our body undergoes stress and we might feel our heart rate increase, our breathing change, or other bodily changes:

When we can identify how fear shows up for us, and some of the signs we might be experiencing fear, we can take steps to manage the emotion and our responses.

This discussion will talk about themes such as fear and stress, and topics that could be upsetting or triggering for those reading along. There are questions we have planned ahead of time to keep this conversation safe and constructive, but if at any time you feel distressed, you are welcome to reach out to our peer support or counselling services for additional support.

51 replies

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In response to: Fear

Re: Fear

For me fear shows up a lot around the safety of loved ones. If they are late home I get very fearful. Also just recently I have experienced an extreme amount of fear surrounding the prospect of commencing trauma therapy with my psychologist. I got a very intense desire to run away. I experienced a lot of fear growing up so it's a bit of a trigger for me. @cloudcore

In response to: Fear

Re: Fear

Question 2:

Fear shows up in my life as severe anxiety and symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. I'm in that state right now and it is hard to write.

In response to: Fear

Re: Fear

Fear can stop me from doing things. Often it is the things I need most. Sometimes I am able to push myself through my fears and talk to people at the shops, in public. Sometimes the fear is too scary, so I purposely tend to avoid talking to males.

Trying something new, like returning to study, but my fear of failure, of doubting myself, is strong, so after more than a year of talking about returning to study, I still haven't done anything about it.

It is hard to move past these fears that are due to earlier experiences. And very hard to move forward when you don't have anyone cheering you on.

In response to: Fear

Re: Fear

@cloudcore feeling scared, anxious, nervous most often. Paranoid or on alert too. Can have physical side effect of heart racing/feeling extreme palpitations

For second question, when feeling too fearful to go to work in the morning at old jobs, when hard conversations need to happen, walking later at night then expected, wondering what to do in the future

In response to: Re: Fear

Re: Fear

Hi @cloudcore

when I fear something eg going out for a walk I think if all the "bad" things that can happen. So I end up staying home in my own cocoon.
Sometimes fear will freeze me. It brings up past trauma.

In response to: Fear

Re: Fear

Q2. Fear often shows up in my life around uncertainty and change.

Fear can also be triggered by (seemingly) random events/interactions that initially take me by surprise.

Physically, the ground seems to fall away beneath me leaving me feeling dizzy, shaky, heart racing, difficulty breathing and swallowing and a tight stomach. @cloudcore

In response to: Fear

Re: Fear

I'm still picking up the pieces of my continously blown mind about the difference between burning air and burning sugar (aerobic and anaerobic) in order to think and move. It explains, like, 90% of tai-chi stuff.

When I look at this topic and chart, I think fear is definately a sugar-burner. That's why breathing is harder but also the best thing to improve. I'm not even sure if the oxygen-burning slow-twitch muscles even do fear. Maybe slow-twitching = courage. It feels like that's kind of the thing.

In response to: Re: Fear

Re: Fear

Hello @cloudcore , all

My psychiatrist told me I grew up living in fear. I still live in fear now around losing my boy. When I go out and come back I have anxiety around walking into the house. When I wake and go into his room I have anxiety.

When he's in the shower/ bathroom I have anxiety.

Fear is awful to live in.

I am a work in progress around turning it around, not at all easy...

In response to: Re: Fear

Re: Fear

Fear is awful.
I'm cheering you on!
Remember to go easy on yourself : )

In response to: Fear

Re: Fear

Fear for me can be a kind of constant companion that goes hand in hand with anxiety and can get worse sometimes. Usually, this is when there's been some kind of trigger (such as to a past trauma), there's something (or someone) new, uncertainty or change. Often for me, I can narrow it down to 'fear of the unknown'.

Here's a (slightly paraphrased/ shortened) quote from a show that I like that I find a helpful and slightly comforting reminder sometimes, especially when I get stuck in those moments of fear:

Fear is a superpower. Fear can make you faster, and cleverer and stronger.

If you're very wise and very strong, fear can make you kind.

It doesn't matter if there's nothing under the bed or in the dark, so long as you know it's ok to be afraid of it.

Fear is like a companion, a constant companion, always there, but that's ok. Because fear can bring us together. Fear can bring you home. Fear makes companions of us all.

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