Help

'So what's the point'.

The point is that you are HERE and you are having struggles. That's the point. You are worth it and you deserve it.

@saltandpepper

I want to feel better @BPDSurvivor i want it to stop. Just once. Just one dayz it mever stops. It doesnt mayter what i do or try. Nothing drowns it out. Nothinf stops itZ nothing.

Sounds very very hard @saltandpepper

It doesn't carry much weight, I know, in the face of those overwhelming feelings, but I'm glad you're here. I hope you can find reasons too. My kids are one of mine.

Yeah of course @frog and my boy is everything to me. I just injust cant. I cant. Its too fukinhd hard. And inknow its selfish. I know im wrong. I really want ro fixking die.

I hear you @saltandpepper and I'm so sorry.

Can I just say I think the bravest thing you have done is keep going even when you didn't want to, and you still are.

Here sitting with you S&P in the hope it helps a little bit 🙏

I like @frog's idea about thinking of reasons to stay

Hey @saltandpepper

Things feel really intensely hard and overwhelming in this moment and I want to encourage you to try your best to take a few deep breaths. I'm going to send you an email so please keep an eye out for it.

The idea of ir is so appealing. This sunny wasm welcoming option dangling just out of my reach. I could just take it. Reach out and take it. It sounds like everything I want. To be free. To be done. Free. Kwant it so badlyz but i know its wrong. K know i cant do thst to my boy. But i want it so badly. I dont want to keep doing this thinking this feeling rhis. I want it to soltop. Stop. I want it to be done

Going to just hold you really tight @saltandpepper ask you to slow your breathing down. Reminding you how much you matter right now. 💙

@Anastasia That is the nost comforting offer and if i close my eyes i can almost convince myself its real. And that is both beautiful and painful. Because it feels real but it's not. I wish it were real. I wish it wasn't a fabrication of my imagination.

I wish it too @saltandpepper but our subconscious is a powerful thing and I can feel it too. I told you once I'm a firm believer in fate. We met for a reason. Hold onto that please. I'm not going anywhere, I'm here for you and I want you to carry that with you when you feel like this. Tonight when the moon is out, go and look at it. I will too, something irl we can share 🌒 🙏💙