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How do you know you have the right psychologist??

BlueBaySenior Contributor21 May 2021, 12:52 pm AEST

How do you know you have the right psychologist??

Hi everyone

@Owlunar @saltandpepper @Shaz51 @Eve7 @BPDSurvivor @Zoe7 @Faith-and-Hope @oceangirl @MDT @Emelia8 and anyone else reading along -

How do you know if you're psychologist is the right one for you? In the past 10 years I have seen 6 different psychologists. I saw one for 5 years but he decided he couldn't help me anymore so I had to find someone else. I saw one for 2 years who was very good and dealt with trauma. But then i couldn't afford seeing her so i had to stop. That's when i starting seeing someone at the local hospittal community centre. She is for free but looking back it's only talking to her; not much else. She doesn't have background in trauma therapy or DBT (dialetical behaviour therapy) or even helping someone with BPD (borderline personality disorder)

I have an appt to see her again in August as that was the earliest i could get in. But in the meantime I have been feeling that i needed someone much sooner, so I emailed my pscyh and he gave me a few names to see. I made an appt last week to see a guy called E. He basically asked lots of questions and gave me some deep breathing exercises to do when anxious. I had another appt today but a lot of it was about God and how he found God to help him with his trauma and depression and he told me he is on my journey with me to help me find me.

I walked out feeling like 'i don't know about this guy'. he seems very caring, understanding and friendly - but - i don't want to go in every week talking about God. Don't get me wrong, I am religious being Catholic but i don't understand why he mentions it so much.

He told me today that i need to trust him and he will help me.

The way i am at the moment i am confused; not sure if i should continue or see someone else. I have found another psycholgoist who delas with childhood sexual abuse, trauma, depression and uses DBT as therapy. Which is what i need for someone like me with BPD.

So, how do you know if you have the right person? and is it good to change every now and then?

22 replies

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In response to: How do you know you have the right psychologist??

AppleblossomSenior Contributor22 May 2021, 6:03 pm AEST

Re: How do you know you have the right psychologist??

I was very accepting abd took on my therapists presumptions to make it low conflict for me, I guess.

@BlueBay Good on you for getting more assertive.

I still have difficulties choosing, and recently saw a vid about not trusting one's gut when dealing with CPTSD. I have found it very confusing and not a clear guide at all, although I try and reflect and do all those things.

Take Care Be YOU.

Apple

In response to: How do you know you have the right psychologist??

Zoe7Senior Contributor22 May 2021, 9:13 pm AEST

Re: How do you know you have the right psychologist??

That all sounds really positive @BlueBay 👍

In response to: How do you know you have the right psychologist??

BPDSurvivorSenior Contributor22 May 2021, 9:24 pm AEST

Re: How do you know you have the right psychologist??

Wow @BlueBay . How impressive! I can already see a shift in how you previously would react versus how you did react - well done! Reflecting on this can help you push through.

The list you can up with is fantastic! I don't know if you remember me mentioning how I interrogated a new GP to determine whether she would be suitable for my needs. I put everything out there and asked her whether she believed she would be able to meet my needs - she said yes, and she's stuck to it. So, @BlueBay , you are entitled to 'interview' your treating team. Beggars can't be choosers, but sounds like you have options to choose from - good on you!

BPDSurvivor

In response to: How do you know you have the right psychologist??

ShiningStarSenior Contributor23 May 2021, 1:06 am AEST

Re: How do you know you have the right psychologist??

Hi @BlueBay

My pleasure

Oh wow! I’m just so impressed by the way in which you’re advocating for yourself and making decisions that are in your best interests - well done

I’m also really impressed with how you’ve been able to think through some of the things that are important for you in therapy, as well as being able to identify those things that stand to adversely impact your ability to engage in the therapeutic process

Absolutely! Your time and money are really valuable resources and I believe that we all deserve to be allowed to make decisions in relation to who we share these with

I think that ‘interviewing’ your next Psychologist is a fantastic idea This is something that I’ve routinely done and I’ve always found that it’s helped me to be able to determine whether or not to schedule an appointment with a particular Therapist.

Well done again on how you’re working through a really difficult situation

Take care of yourself,

ShiningStar