My daughter attempted suicide

Hi @Former-Member

Sorry for the late reply - this is the first chance I have had to post as I have only returned home after being with daughter for most of the day. Tomorrow I won't be able to visit her until 3pm as she will be accessed by doctors most of the day.

I was sad to read that you felt so alone on your hospital admission. It's so hard when we don't receive that vital support we need when in such a dark place, that's why sites such as SANE are so invaluable; - this tells me how strong and resilient you are, and how special to help others when suffering so much yourself. You are a very special lady indeed.

I haven't any knowledge of support groups/services for survivors of suicide. Would appreciate it if you can pass on any names of such.

I did cry briefly today when I was talking to my husband at the hospital cafeteria of what we had both just witnessed with our daughter - not only the reality that we nearly lost our beloved daughter, but when she fitted she showed signs of brain damage. I asked the paramedics at that stage (just after first seizure at home) if this damage was permanent. They said they don't know for sure. At that moment I felt defeated , that I couldn't get through this myself.

The damage wasn't permanent and the doctors are baffled as apparently it should of been. We will ask the doctors more questions tomorrow when they speak to us about treatment. Thank you for your support @Former-Member xxx

Hello @utopia

Thank you for your love and support - it means a lot. I have just returned home so haven't had a chance to read grateful90's post. I will once I finish posting here. Thank you for bringing my attention to it - hope keeps me going.

Its inspiring to read of your positive outcome after your admission. Can I ask what you feel helped you the most?

I so hope for this outcome for my daughter. Hugs xx

Hello dear @Appleblossom

It is horrific watching someone I love so much go through this - it tears me apart; not being able to give her the peace she needs to pull her out of this. Makes me feel so helpless at times - I have to take it one day at a time to not be overwhelmed. I am thinking of you too my friend hoping you are feeling better xxxx ❤️

Hello @Sahara

Your post really moved me - you are such a good friend. Thank you for being there. Another couple of nurses said to myself and husband today that it was a miracle my daughter survived such a high dose of anti-ds - it goes against science. So yes, I believe with all my heart what you said and this has made me feel more at peace. Thank you my friend. This site is so invaluable....Sending lots of love to you xxx

Hello dear @pip

Thank you so much for your support and heartfelt post. It really spoke to me - everything you said fits my daughter and the situation to a tee. My daughter hasn't received counselling as yet because she was admitted to the mental health ward on Saturday and the accessing psychiatrists won't be seeing her until tomorrow. We should know more of her treatment then.

She definitely needs counselling - she has refused it in the past but I am hoping that will change. She realises that she has been treated badly. And I think she is now starting to see that it's not her fault now (she blamed herself whole heartedly up until today). Everyone close to her, including hospital staff have been telling her that this is not her fault and she now feels it's best to move on without bf. But you were right when saying she is having difficulty leaving the bf (withdrawal). She tried ringing him twice today only to be fobbed off - I mentioned casually that by doing this she is empowering his abuse - that she is empowering him. Then she rang him a third time and said "I don't want to be with you". So for some reason my last desperate attempt to get through to her may have helped - but it's early days and you are right, she could "dither".

I asked her what she would do if she was hurt badly again, felt that unbearable pain again and she replied "learn strategies to cope". But I am not sure she is just telling me what I want to hear at the moment. What makes me feel so anxious/impatient is that if she is hurt again she could attempt to suicide again. Like she is a ticking time bomb. I am not sure how to deal with this in my own mind.

If you and others don't mind I may tag you all and ask for advice when stuck as this situation unfolds - your personal experience here @pip is invaluable to me. Thank you for caring. Warm hugs ❤️

Hi @Former-Member; @Former-Member and All,

There is a great support service in Victoria and Tasmania for bereaved family members called Compassionate Friends. PH: 03) 9888 4944 or 1800 641 091 (country Victoria). This is a 24 hr helpline, and they also run support groups in those two states. There is a support group in Melbourne for people bereaved by suicide. I'm sure there are similar services in other states.

For you @Former-Member, I guess its important to utilise the support available right now from public mental health service. Press the Drs who see your daughter for a treatment plan which may involve medication, counselling and case management. Your daughter should be encouraged to take an active role in her recovery.

You may also need to find a counsellor for yourself to process what has happened and to gain support.

Best wishes,

Frog

Thank you @Former-Member for the information and support. I have had much trauma in my life and to date have never been able to receive adequate counselling help or understanding; people tend to not cope, don't know what to say, shrug their shoulders or run. They see the situation as despairing, which it is and can't handle it. That's been my experience - apart from forums like these. That is why they are so important - invaluable.

But I may try again. I am feeling the strain, feeling so drained mentally and physically at the moment which I need to rise above for daughters sake. But as for support, apart from here and my husband (who is under the same strain) I am totally alone. I do get tired of carrying everything alone. People usually run in these situations. So all I have left is faith and hope to survive. I just hope it can be strong enough at this time. It has to be for my daughters sake as it really is about her welfare.

You have come along way @utopia. Having more moments of joy now makes everything worthwhile. I am so happy for you and it's a credit to you. I hope my daughter can be just as strong. xx

Our daughter just phoned from the hospital after being seen by the doctors/psychiatrists. She told us they said she is very lucky to be alive given the dose she took. That she should'nt be here. And that she has sustained very, very mild brain damage that should of been major. They kept emphasising how lucky she was.

They want to keep here there to Wednesday and then reassess. But they did not discuss any treatment plan with her?? We will be going to see her there this afternoon and hopefully learn more as this seems odd to me. She can also come out with us for a few hours now before she has to go back which will be nice for all xx