My Mosaic

Hey @Bow

Still here with you sweetheart.

💜💜

You’re a much loved member here @Bow

Here with you 💖🤗💖

Firstly @Bow ... I'm so relieved to hear that you're safe. And I thank you for letting us know. 🙏💕👍

Secondly ... There is no need to apologise. You reached out to members for support, and that's a good thing. 😊💝 I'm only sorry there was nothing I could do to help you, despite a strong desire to do so. Thats the drawback of the forums ... there is no ability to physically support each other.

I certainly dont believe you should leave the forums, and really hope that you dont. 😔🌷 Fact is, we need you, just as much as you need us. We all have problems @Bow ... If we didn't, we would not be here. 🌺

Perhaps take a day or two out, seek offline support as needed and then come back?🌹

Emelia 💞

just briefly wanted to say thank you @Emelia8 @Eve7 @Snowie @outlander @traveller

Its been my pleasure to be here for you when I can @Bow 😄💝

Any time sweetheart. 🌷

Emelia 💞

you have a nice nap @Emelia8 ?

@Bow here with you hun 💜💜

ive had a rough few days taking a step away and trying to access some supports, but its hard when there isnt really alot available. while i know the best place for me to be is somewhere safe, its just not doable for me. there are so many other things to consider.

i really dont know how to do this thing called living anymore. i see the pdoc tomorrow that i really dont want to see, but my gp wants me to stick with it, at least until something else is in place and goodness knows how long that is going to take. i just dont see how he is going to be able to help me. he is so old.... and old school. i just dont see that he will relate to anything that i am dealing with.

i see my gp again on friday, my bloods are really low again, so i am suppose to be taking suppliments, that is a battle in itself. i will find out what the recommendations are from my psychologist on friday too and whether she will see me anymore. i did manage to call and make an appointment with another psychologist at a different clinic, gave them a good run down on what i am currently dealing me, including my eating issues, sh and si. i hate the thought of having to start all over again and really dont know if its worth it. i feel extremely flat.

my folks are going away next week... needing to keep myself well so i dont ruin their time away. they need the time away together.

my pastors leave this week, they have officially handed over and are going away for 2 months. these are people that know everything about me just about and have walked through alot of things over the years with me. i havent even be able to be honest with them in recent months knowing that they are leaving anyways. feels like i will be absolutely alone. i caught up with them earlier today and they made the comment that they are glad that im not in the same place that i was just before christmas..... i felt terrible. knowing that i am indeed in that place, if not worse. feel like i am holding everything together for everyone around me... my daughter, my parents, my responsibilities at church/my job, yet inside i am falling apart.... and just want to fall in a heap on the ground and disappear.

anyways, im just rambling, dont know why i even share any of this.

Hey @Bow

It is not rambling hun, sometimes it is better to get things out of our head.

It sounds like you are going through so much at the moment. It also sounds to me that you are trying so hard at the moment too. Booking an appointment with another psychologist shows just how much you are trying to reach out for help. It shows me how much strength and courage you are showing and trying your hardest.

We are here for you and with you hun.

💜💜

Sitting with you @Bow

💙🤗💙