My Mosaic

Sounds like the dietitian is really in your corner @Bow

I'm glad she understands and she is going to talk to your gp. Now just to make an appt. with them... Perhaps some liquids might be a good idea.

@Bow I'm with @Snowie - your dietician is totally in your corner and is actually validating your experience and understanding of your stuggles. I'm glad you have her.

I have indeed heard of the cycle of change, can be a handy tool to help track where you are in regards to taking steps forward. It sounds like you were able to acknowledge as well that getting to the next stage and engaging in harm reduction might prove to be challenging. But it could serve as a roadmap for you.

Thanks for sharing hun, good to know that there's people around you who are so committed and caring. Are you making a gp appt soon do you reckon?

Yeah I could agree to either of her suggestions for harm reduction @Jynx very much in a stuck place.

no intention to make that gp appointment. I’ve just had my support worker here too and she asked again. Just can’t do it

how was your day?

Had my own GP appt today @Bow - it legit took me about a month to make it, so I can relate. Turns out I'm low on vitamin D and my blood pressure is a bit low. I'm also very overdue for a review of my ADHD meds by a psychiatrist. So watch as it takes me another month to make that appt... 😅

No I will try not to let it wait that long. But I know how hard it is. Maybe we can make a commitment together? Not if that will feel like too much pressure for you. More like accounabilibuddies (which is a concept in ADHD circles, to help keep each other accountable, since it's so easy to forget or for anxiety to make it harder to do things). You could also do some journalling/introspection to have a think about the barriers you have to making the GP appt.

Anything on for you this weekend?

Some sunshine and more water for you @Jynx ?? I suspect I will be low in numerous vitamins and minerals and low bp too.
maybe we could make a commitment?

I know the majority of the barriers to making that appointment. And it’s not so much about the go herself, more about the blood tests she’ll want me to have. And nope not afraid of needles.

I had my meds at 4pm today. Already feeling it and I have a GS call at 7 😩

the weekend…. Not much really. D is at her her fathers on Saturday. I’ll probably clean out my walk in robe. I did my room last weekend. Sunday not sure what we will do.

what about you? It’s your weekend off?

More sunshine, more water, I like it @Bow let's do it. We can try to check back in with each other next week perhaps.

Mm I get you hun, blood tests = knowing how much you're lacking in vitamins/nurtients and how impactful the ED is on your health, etc. It does worry me to hear, and I hope you are able to push through those mental blocks and remember that your health is super important, even when your ED is determined to ignore it.

Oof, that makes it very tough to stay engaged! You could always ask them to postpone the GS call to another day, when you can ask for an earlier timeslot?

Oh nice! Bit of spring cleaning sounds awesome. I ought to jump onto that for myself. I also want to repot my succulents, some are looking a little sad and others are looking overgrown.

This weekend I'm going caving! My bestie has invited a few of us to go explore some caves as her bday celebration. I'm both excited and nervous! We'll have to wear harnesses and abseil in. It's guided so I'm sure there's heaps of safety measures in place, but still something pretty spooky about descending into the dark bowels of the earth 😱😂

nah ya gotta give 24hrs notice to cancel. I should have planned ahead knowing that my support worker would be witnessing the pill swallowing tonight and that it would be early. But alas I didn’t. And my last GS call they were kind enough to cancel with no notice cause community mh turned up late, a couple of mins after they called. So I shall just push through tonight.

I like a good spring clean, throw out heaps of junk. But gotta be in the mood.

caving sounds fun… but scary too. I have some what of a fear of drowning and getting caught it tight spaces. I watched the movie on Netflix about that Thai cave rescue with those boys. That was crazy how tight those caves were. I’m sure with it being guided though there will be heaps of safety stuff as you said.

@Bow Mm that sense of achieving something sounds pretty strong, even though it's achieving something so detrimental to you. Have you found other things that can give you a sense of achievement?

I hope the call has ended up being helpful for you in the end 😊

I struggle to motivate myself to clean, but once I'm in the rhythm of it it's like a cyclone of cleaning - I end up doing quite a lot all in one day. But then it piles up again. Can be frustrating at times.

Yeah I'm hoping it won't be too hectic, especially with this low blood pressure. Probably something to mention to them. But my friend has a sore back so we've agreed that we'll buddy up and just go slow together.

That’s how my ED started out a couple

of years ago @Jynx … the control thing and the sense of achievement at the end of the day. It felt good…. It still feels good when I’ve kept to all my strict ED rules. Hmm other things that give me a sense of achievement??? Not really. Hmm well maybe my painting? After all the hours I put in and I finally finish one. There really isn’t much else.

I made it through my GS call and it was helpful. We did something a little different this time, it was interesting.

oh I love the cyclone of cleaning. I’m mostly good at keeping my own space clean. Things need to be neat and tidy, gives me that weird sense of control when everything in my head is a real mess. And when other parts of the house are messy and untidy it stresses me out. My D’s room is a huge issue! I give it a deep clean every couple of months and I make her clean it before she goes to her fathers- it’s her motivation. But it’s always a bomb sight. Gotta step over toys, Lego, clothes to tuck her in.
We have 2 spare rooms, one is a spare bedroom/ mums sewing room. I don’t take any responsibility for that one! The other is the spa room. It has a huge spa in it that doesn’t work, my treadmill, the cats sleep in their of a night and it’s a dumping ground. It stresses me out how messy and cluttered it is! I’m not very good at cleaning other parts of the house.

don’t want you passing out in the caves @Jynx ! You get lightheaded with the low bp?

@Bow painting is an amazing creative endeavour. Maybe putting some energy towards it can help become a protection for you. Something to think about anyway.

Glad your GS went well!

And yeah my house would probably resemble your D's haha. Stresses me out too, that and the never ending piles of laundry and dishes. Yeesh.

Yeah if I stand up too quick I get dizzy, nearly passed out the other night. Get the mad tunnel vision. Hopefully some sunshine, and more water will help.

I'm off soon hun, was nice chatting with you as always. I'll see you next week, hope your cleaning weekend goes swimmingly 😊