My Mosaic

@tyme I had every intention last night of going. But when the morning arrived it just felt too hard. I thought about it all day. When my peer worker called I kinda dropped hints that I was really not ok, but I don’t think she understood and I couldn’t blurt it out.

I often found that hospital was a good circuit breaker if things had been tough for a long time. @Bow .

Yeah I think it often is @tyme

but things are so difficult at home at the moment. Mum has enough pressure. I don’t wanna add to it.
And I also worry that I’ll get there, not eat and then end up becoming medically unstable and get transferred to a medical ward and then end up in there much longer than I need or want. It’s happened every other time.

but then I’m really scared of what I am capable of doing to myself. It’s all I think about. I’m so done.

Makes sense @Bow .

Then again, what do you think will help you at this time?

You know yourself best.

It is important that you are safe. I'll just include crisis lines here in case you need them:

Lifeline: 13 11 14 or Crisis Chat

Suicide call back service: 1300 659 467 or online counselling

If in immediate danger: 000

Will someone please keep me accountable tomorrow morning. That I speak honestly with my case manager.

What time is your appointment. @Bow

I don’t have one. I am suppose to… the plan… is to text her now that I really need to see her and that it’s important. But scared to do it tonight incase she leaves her phone on.
so want to text her in the morning

can not chicken out @Captain24

Ok @Bow. Do you want me to checkin in the morning and see that you do text her?

Please and thank you @Captain24

I will do @Bow.