My Mosaic

And thinking about it more @Bow, when opened again unexpectedly, the fallout can feel even bigger. The surprise adds to the alarm.

What can you do tonight for some relief?

@tyme I have so much trauma. Various times through my life from being very young to just a couple of years ago.

I disappeared for part of when my pdoc was talking today. But I remember her talking about the self blame. I then just sat there and nodded, I couldn’t talk.

I don’t even know where to begin with it all.

Yes @Former-Member I think cause it has been so unexpected, it has really knocked me. I feel physically sick

and yes @Captain24 very raw.

im thankful that my case manager sits in on my appointments. I messaged her afterwards once I got home and she called me a while later. I chatted with her a little but didn’t really have any words. Just hate that it’s happened on a Friday afternoon.

@tyme is right. You need to decide when you open that up because it is such a deep and personal experience. Otherwise it can just incite anxiety. Sometimes having the confidence to speak out when thrown off about your trauma can be hard too. Make sure you keep YOU as the objective @Bow 💜

Yep @Bow, that will happen 😰. Take care and listen to your body on what you need tonight. Take care of YOU 💝

How do you ever be ready for that???

my psychologist will say I have come a long way. I can actually sit in a whole session now. Not need to get up and walk around. Not disappear as much. But that’s cause we ain’t been doing trauma stuff. If we open that can of worms… I don’t know…

how do I ever be ok after all of this??

Not sure we are ever ok after trauma. I think that through help and support we may learn to survive? Sometimes understanding it can help us to survive possible future traumas and triggers but I think the focus is not fixing the trauma but learning from it to protect us later @Bow.

need to feel safe

Here with you @Bow

Is your Mum and Step Dad home?

Yeah they are home @Former-Member

I’ve just crawled into bed