My Mosaic

Okay @Bow ... its not all bad. Can you try very hard to eat two meals a day? Its a small price to pay for not being forced back into hospital. Even one meal plus a banana as a second meal is better than just one meal. It does sound odd that you have a high iron reading. Hope they can sort out the reasons for that.

I can understand your frustration, but not your self hatred. You're trying ... thats all anyone can ask. If you're doing your best and still cant get there .. then help may be needed. At least your GP sounds like she is on board in that regard. It sounds like you are self sabotaging ... which is very destructive, as you say. Dont stop trying though Bow, dont quit ... you are certainly NOT wasting her time. However ... if you were to give up now ... that would amount to her wasting her time. Please dont give up. You are most definitely worth the effort required to get through this.

Hang in there. Is there something small and tasty that you can have for supper tonight? Even if its cheese and crackers or a cuppa and a biscuit. Maybe that banana you're meant to be having to boost your potassium. Do you like avocado? Avocado is a very good source of potassium, and is nice sliced up on a piece of fresh bread or toast.

How is your little girl?

Emelia 💞

Sitting with you @Bow and always believing in you.

Stay safe and try to enjoy the bananas.

💛🤗💛

Thanks @Emelia8 always appreciate your kindness and thoughtfulness in responding. I managed some salmon and salad for dinner, mum cooked, so I ate. I do usually eat dinner, I was chatting with the butterfly foundation this evening, trying to process through some thoughts and I think I eat dinner as a secret compromise to skipping breakfast and lunch. I think if I ma... sorry don’t know why I’m saying all this.

My daughter is good. We spent most of the day out at my work meeting, she played with some friends while I had my meeting and then we went and visited with another friend. I feel wiped out physically tonight and my anxiety has been extremely bad this evening since talking to my gp. I’m over thinking things that I am feeling in my body.

did I ever tell you that I had a dear friend in high school called Amelia? I nearly named my daughter that 🙂

i do hope that you are travelling some better today? Please take time for you x

🌷

Thank you @Eve7 hope you are being gentle with yourself this even after your appointment today- I’m glad it was a good one.

i will eat bananas, but not a big fan and they have to be just right, not too ripe not green. Maybe with some peanut butter? Or Nutella?

i was scrolling Instagram today and psalms 23 popped up again and I thought of you. 🌸

I think of you when I see that psalm @Bow

I like banana and honey on toast with cinnamon or nutmeg.

Tonight has been calm for me, just watching tv with my son.

💕🦋

Yes that is a nice combination on toast @Eve7 wish I was kind enough to myself to allow myself to eat it. 😩

im glad your night has been calm.

Wish I could calm down, my chest hurts tonight, I think it’s anxiety, but with everything else going on it scares me.

The GP increased my nighttime ad so I think that is helping tonight @Bow

We’re watching Reign on Stan which is about Mary Queen of Scots. It’s fsscinating although a bit brutal in parts as they were back then.

Glad it’s helping @Eve7

I’ve just started looking through Stan, lots of things to watch.

Going to try and sleep @Eve7 @outlander

hope you both get some rest

good night

Good night seeetie @Bow

Pleasant Dreams 💜