My Mosaic

Been a shitty day.
seen dietitian. She’s pleased with my progress.
seen case manager. Was pretty honest with her.
It’s now the weekend.
urgh.

Any plans for the weekend? @Bow

Hey @tyme

got my sister in laws baby shower tomorrow. Not much else. Will attempt to go to church Sunday maybe.
you @tyme ?

That sounds refreshing @Bow .

I've got lots of double booked events this weekend, so I'm sifting through and prioritising LOL.

I've been invited to a house warming, invited for a late Greek Easter lunch celebration, I'm working in the evenings....I also hope to catch up with family.

So yeah....busy, but I like it that way.

I'm not good at sitting idle - too much thinking time!

Your daughter returned to school this week? How'd she go?

tyme

Oh dear, that does sound a bit overwhelming! Good luck with prioritising it all!

I love Greek food… we had ‘my big fat Greek’ for dinner. We have been cake decorating and cookie decorating this afternoon… and mums been doing it all day, so got take away. We are both tired.

I’ve just crawled into bed and watching a movie.

yea daughter went back to school Wednesday. All good. She loves school, which makes it easy.

So glad to hear @Bow .

Have a pleasant rest and looking forward to seeing you around!

tyme

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@Bow wrote:

seen dietitian. She’s pleased with my progress.

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This seems huge to me, @Bow ! Well done for this victory!

I’m very peopled out. Attended my sister in laws baby shower today, we were out most of the day and I am ready to collapse in a heap. I’ve just taken the dog for a walk…. Some exercise for me. And can’t keep fighting back the tears now. Nothing major. Just everything tipping me over the edge tonight.

i seen my gp this morning. I had to go back to her to renew my ED health care plan. She of course had to weigh me and I am disgusted. I’ve been eating better and I’ve staked on heap of weight very quickly. I know it just shows how much I have been restricting and it’s my body just going back to it’s normal weight. But my ED is very loud and angry and wanting to restrict. I will start afresh on Monday.
I came home from my appointment and got ready to go out to the baby shower and I made a comment about my weight gain to my mum and that I need to lose weight. She said we can do it together. Healthy self though that’s not what I need. But ED is cheering. Someone to help encourage my weight lose and I’ll probably be able to get away with so much if mum Is joining me.
i feel flat and really depressed tonight. I just wanna take my meds super early and go to bed. I truely hate myself and my life. I want it to be over. I remember sitting in my room yesterday with my case manager, she again reminded me how very close I came recently….. and asked me whether I fully grasped how close it was. Sometimes I think about it. It’s scary. Other times I want to see how far I can push my body.
it’s a sad miserable life. One that I don’t want anymore.

Oh @Bow I’ve read your post and I’m worried about you hon. are you safe for now? Please call out if you need help.

Your life is worthwhile and you are very valuable even when you have voices screaming at you otherwise. I hear you loud and clear.

Lots of love

💙💚💙🤗🙏🤗💚💙💚

Hey @Bow ,

I hear there's a lot going on for you tonight.

Please reach out to relevant services as you feel the need.

Lifeline: 13 11 14

Suicide call back service: 1300 659 467

If in immediate danger: 000

You must be so tired from today. You've sure accomplished a lot. If you're not asleep yet, what does your wind-down routine look like tonight?

Any plans for tomorrow? Did you say you had church today or tomorrow?

Kindest,

tyme