My Mosaic

Thanks @NatureLover @Codex1

I’m still really not in an ok place. Just staying away from here for the sake of others.

I'm not sure I understand the "for the sake of others', but I'm sorry you're not OK 😞

Am sending wishes that you can get to that OK place soon. 💜

@Bow

I get in trouble for sharing what’s happening for me, Cause it might upset others. It’s real shitty being asked to be quiet over something that I forced to keep quiet out of fear and shame. So best I just stay away.

Hey @Bow I'm really hearing that you feel like you can't truly express what is on your mind at the moment. Things sound really rough for you right now and I feel like it would be helpful to have some of your community around you. I'd invite you to share what you feel you can, and of course if anything pops up on the radar I will email you and we can work through it together.

I think it's important that you are able to share how you feel, so by all means flick us an email if you are unsure about anything and we can help you out. Here with you 💜

@Jynx I shared a piece last night that I wrote about what happened a year ago yesterday. It was removed and I was asked to delete half of it. I chose not to edit it and repost because it would take away half my story, half of what happened, half of my truth. Silencing me. As a victim who is silenced already by fear, shame, previous responses from people and the horrible stigma attached to what happened is shit. Silence, secrecy and shame are the offenders best friends… and is the victims worst enemy. Makes me feel like I did something wrong. That I am the criminal by not being allowed to share my story. It’s disempowering, I have already had so much taken from me and by having my voice stripped of me, my ability to share my story without shame and some kind of control back… it hurts just as much as what happened.
i get that not everyone will understand. I get it.
An adequate trigger warning should be ok and people taking some responsibility for managing their emotions and reactions- words said to me when I said things trigger me here too.

That’s all. probably be banned now. I’ll go cry in a corner now on my own.

I understand all that you have said @Bow ... I get it. I have been there. I am really sorry. 😔💗

I really hear you @Bow, I can only imagine how much bravery it took to be able to talk about something so deeply painful only to have it taken down. As disempowered as you may feel, it doesn't take away from that bravery.

And I will doubly acknowledge that disempowerment too, for exactly the reasons you've written - that there exists such horrible societal norms of shaming, victim blaming, and silencing. In that sense, I would encourage you to keep sharing, if you feel like it could help. Whilst descriptions of traumatic events themselves are typically too graphic, you are always welcome to talk about all the other stuff - how it has made you feel, how it has impacted you, and even those weird little details (like maybe you get triggered by certain smells or maybe you feel unsafe to do things which once you would do without a second thought). You deserve to have your voice heard.

If you want to express those more intense details in order to get them off your chest or help with processing, you can always get onto the HC for some 1:1 support; you could even copy/paste the post you wrote into an email or a chat.

You haven't done something wrong. You are not banned. We want to help you through this time as best we can Bow. Feel free to get in touch if you're uncertain about anything, and I'm happy to keep sitting with you if you like. You deserve all the care and support! 💜

Been trying to get into the hc for a couple

of hours..