Had my pdoc appointment this morning. I had one of the other SW’s there with me and not a casual so that was ok.
tole him how bad my thoughts are, how hard it is to distract myself from them. He asked me the 1-10 question, I said I’m sitting at an 8 most of the time. He suggested a short planned admission. I said no, not keen for that. He explained that there is a very short window of time to have that short planned admission and we don’t want to miss it. And we don’t want me doing things I have done in the past.
He asked if I knew why things have been a bad and I explained to him that I believe a lot of it is to do with my body image, ED and the intense self hatred and disgust I feel due to the weight I have put on this year. I asked if we could look at reducing some meds that have the weight gain as a side effect and he was pretty hesitant, saying he didn’t think it would help that much. But he eventually agreed to a small reduction and seeing him again in 2 weeks time instead of the usual 4-6weeks.
he also asked about whether I am continuing with my therapy and I said that was something else I wanted to talk to him about and explained I won’t have a psychologist once mine goes on mat leave. He was concerned about that, saying therapy is so important, more important than the medication. He said he would see what he could do. So fingers crossed.
im feeling pretty flat today. Very low energy
