My Mosaic

Thank you for all that you said @Jynx i really do appreciate every word.
I really wanna talk to mum about it. I need her… emotional support and I think I need her to say that it’s ok to make that decision. But I’m too scared to. She’s paid all the recent vet bills. The expensive surgery. But no one of us knew it would be an ongoing issues.

urgh

@Bow hmm... ever heard of the 'sunk cost fallacy'? It's "the phenomenon whereby a person is reluctant to abandon a strategy or course of action because they have invested heavily in it, even when it is clear that abandonment would be more beneficial."

As an example, it's like let's say you bought concert tickets. On the day of the concert you're sick as a dog. The sunk cost fallacy is believing you should go anyway despite feeling like crap because otherwise it's a waste of money. Thing is, the money is spent either way, it's not coming back, and it's entirely likely that going to a concert when sick is going to be absolutely zero fun.

In your situation.... I know it might sound a bit callous when we're talking about an actual life, but basically I'm sorta saying.... just because you spent so much money at the vet, doesn't mean you HAVE to persist; the notion that if you were to put him to sleep now, it would mean all that money was 'wasted' is the fallacy, because... well imagine how you n your mum would feel if you hadn't at least tried? As in, don't let what has already happened dictate what happens next. Focus the convo on what is best for balancing your (as in yours, your mum's and your D's) needs with his. Does that kinda make sense?

I hadn’t heard of that before @Jynx but yes that all makes so much sense. Thank you. I will try have a conversation with mum . Thank you

Any time @Bow 😉 I'm sorry that it's even a conversation that needs to be had, but good on you for taking it in stride. Sending you some huggles darlin 💜🫂

Hey @Bow ,

Sorry to hear about your dear cat. What a choice to have to make. Please don't feel like a terrible pet mum.

I read that now your daughter is sick, just like what you thought last night... oh dear! Is it the same as your mum's.

Is your mum okay tonight? I read that she returned in a taxi last night..

Oh dear, so much happening... sounds like a bit of a whirlwind. At the same time, after the storm there is...CALM.

Hugs @Bow

Thanks @tyme

Yeah daughter is sick. She’s got a cough, snotty nose and an afternoon/evening fever. This is her usual sickness. Hopefully a short version of it though cause it can last beyond a week!

mum is heaps better today. Hospital didn’t really do anything. She was home by 4am and slept til midday and has mostly been fine. Just needs to rebuild her energy after being so depleted.

lots happening indeed. My poor brain. It’s so mentally draining with all that plus my own stuff. Just tucked daughter into bed and have no crawled into bed myself. Nice and cosy.

how was your day?

Hey @Bow ,

I can only imagine! Your poor brain indeed! Sick kids is the WORST! I hope she feels better soon.

I had a busy one today. I had a women's church group in the morning, and because it was school holidays, there were lots of kids with their mums. So I took a kids' class. Then, I took my nephew and niece to get 2 bikes serviced. That was a bit of a drive. Then I took them to visit an elderly man in a nursing home (he was my old neighbour who is now 90 years old).

Then I came home and hopped online to see my forums family 🙂

So yes... busy one here today.

I'm going to start wrapping up a bit earlier tonight, so I'll see you next time. Please look after yourself - and your household lol.

Oh did that mean you missed out on what the women did @tyme ? Do you have to plan the kids stuff? Or is there like a program you follow?
I use to go to MOPs. Have you heard of that? I loved it!

do you bike ride too with the kids?

daughter is feeling heaps better today which is good. We have the big country market tomorrow. And then in the afternoon my d had a birthday party to go to.

I was doing okish.

my SW came to visit.

we were just chatting. All sortsa things. But she mentioned that she was having a few changes to her case load which would free her up a bit. But then she said I wasn’t changing yet. But soon.

I tried not to show the immediate anxiety that hit me like a truck. I still feel it and she has been gone for a while now. I feel sick. Dizzy. Can feel my heart pounding.

Hey @Bow I'm here with you

The thought of this changing would be really anxiety inducing, I hear you on that completely.

Is there anything that you might be able to now to help bring these feelings of anxiety down just a little? Maybe deep breathing, or movement, or distraction, or anything else that generally works for you?