My Mosaic

Hoping you got some well deserved sleep last night @Bow

Sounds like you have got a lot of lego to keep you occupied for awhile.

Any plans for today?

Good morning @Snowie hope you got some sleep last night and that today is going ok so far.

I had a rough night. Went to bed early but woke up a lot and was very headachy through the night and super thirsty. I ended up getting up a couple of times. Still got a lingering headache but it’s not too bad and I’m on the treadmill now.
Need to do this order that I got yesterday as it’s a Mother’s Day one. And do my nails. That’s about it.

you got plans?

Thats not good about your rough night @Bow Hopefully besides the one order you need to make you can take it easy today. Maybe bed and a good movie.

Besides the pile of ironing I have to do, no real plans today but sometimes I find that is a good thing.

Order is complete and now I’m sitting doing my nails @Snowie 2 tones of purple this week.

I can’t remember the last time I used an iron!

Good that you have the order done @Bow

Least now you can have the rest of the day to yourself.

Purple is my favourite colour!

Son's school uniform needs ironing and so does both of their work uniforms. I probably iron more than I really need to also.

Feeling heaps anxious tonight.

I have a dietitian appointment in the morning and then I have my new support group starting.

Good morning @Bow

Just coming to see how your dietitian appointment went.

Also I hope the new support group goes well.

Talk soon hon 💗💗

Thanks for thinking of me @Snowie

@dietitian appointment went ok. More plans to try and increase my fluid intake. I haven’t been using recovery record for the last month or so. Just can’t be bothered. Don’t see the point when it’s pretty much the same stuff every day. Feel like I just repeat myself. So I had more to share with her today cause she I haven’t logged anything.

im just home from the support group. It made for a long afternoon. Driving there, walking to the hospital, waiting around cause I was a bit early. Then doing the group. Walking back to my car and then driving home in semi peak hour traffic.
Group was ok. I felt very isolated though. Very different compared to other participants. There was only 4 of us, plus 2 facilitators. There maybe one more joining us next week. I was the only one with zero facial piercings, I have nothing against facial piercing but the other 3 had multiple ones. They also had bright out their hair styles, again nothing against them. It’s just when you don’t have them and you’re the only one, it’s very obvious. And they also all sat at the one end of the table. So again, I felt isolated.
When we did the pre group assessment, there was a heap of paper work we did and it worked out what our schemas were… my top one was social isolation…. And that was blaringly obvious to me today so that was hard.
One of the things we talked about was the feelings wheel. And we were asked if we felt comfortable, to share what we were feeling today. I shared… said anxious (obviously), eager (to see what this group was all about and what I would learn) and isolated- one of the facilitators asked me to share more about the isolation, asking if it was about the group or in general. I said I prefer to not say 😩😩 We had earlier passed a ball of wool around multiple times and it represented connectedness. The facilitator asked me to grab the wool again and she grabbed it too and told me that she would every now and again give it a gentle tug to remind me that I was connected. I appreciated that.

so I am eager to see what I learn and what it’s all gonna be about but I feel like I’m gonna go each week…. And leave each week feeling very isolated.

how are you and how was your day?
Oh I wanted to ask about your weighted teddy bear… I read you have one on another thread and I’m interested in getting one maybe.

@Jynx @tyme Just tagging you cause I thought ya might like to hear about my schema group

Hi @Bow

Thanks for including me in your post.

Sounds like the dietitian appt. was straight forward.

It must have been a long afternoon for you. You must be tired now.

Social isolation would be one of my top schemas too.

It is hard when we feel like the odd one out. Maybe the group will get better each session. It's good that you are going to at least give it a go. You should be proud of yourself for that.

I did get a weighted unicorn! I can't remember what website I got it from but will search for it. It is good but it's not as weighted as I thought it would be. It does however give me comfort at times. If I had a choice between my weighted blanket and the teddy, the blanket would win every time.

My day started of ok, but has just gone downhill from there. I see my psych in the morning. I have written down some things for her that I don't think I can say out loud.

@Bow Thanks for the tag hun, and the update.

I can hear how out of place you felt, as someone with many piercings and funky hair, I can feel very out of place in a room full of folks who have a more conventional style. It's totally legit to feel this way.

I really love what the facilitator did with the string. It sounds like they're able to acknowledge that extra layer of difficulty and want to go the extra mile to ensure you're feeling included and connected, rather than shaming or you for those feelings, or ignoring them entirely. It's still very early on, so I imagine it'll feel super awkward for a bit, but hopefully it'll get easier as you go along. Perhaps you will even be able to build some connections with the other group members! And if not, then you can always remind yourself that YOU are the focus of this endeavour, as is your process of healing and growing. New connections would just be a happy bonus.

How are you feeling this evening, after a bit of time to process and settle after the feelings of anxiety?