My Mosaic

Thanks captain

Im not long home from my appointment, it was long and fairly brutal. My pdoc went in hard right from the beginning talking about the concerning call from my gp. It’s not my fault they don’t all share information properly there. I thought she was gonna admit me then.
But then we moved on to the note that I wrote, which I had already shared with my support worker before my appointment. My pdoc wanted me to read it out, but I couldn’t, so she read it out loud. Gosh that was hard to hear. Thanks for your words @Jynx they helped a lot.
My appointment was truly all over the place. I don’t feel like I got anywhere and nothing has changed…. Except for my pdoc. She is retiring. Last time I will see her. 😩 someone else leaving me. First my psychologist last year, then my support worker, then my CM and now my pdoc. And they have no idea who…. Or when a new one will be allocated.
I feel like shit now. I don’t feel like my appointment was at all productive. Feels like it was just my pdocs chance to get her last say. Leave me with all her ‘pearls of wisdom’ that half the time didn’t make sense.
Not sure at all why I even sit here and share. Im gonna go away. It seems some people here are very judgemental. And think they know more than they do and they have the right and the power to make statements based off a few bits of information. Im really hurt… when I was already in a really vulnerable and not ok place. Just the push over the edge I needed.
take care

I’m sorry it was brutal @Bow and now another support leaving. Sometimes it just all seems way too hard. But I am proud of you for handing over what you had written. It’s not an easy thing to do.

Im sorry you have been upset on here. (Hope it wasn’t me) If you need some time out then you need to do what is best and safest for you.

I am thinking of you and sending love.

@Bow 💗💗

My life is crumbling, my heads caving in, I don’t even know where to begin, Or how to describe or how to explain the sorrowing I’m feeling, the pain inside. Not sure how to keep going.

@Bow I hear you hon and are sitting with you 💗💗

Hey @Bow here with you. I know it's a really crappy time for you right now, but you're not alone.

Thanks. But I do feel so very alone. I don’t wanna do tomorrow.

@Bow mm I know, words on a screen aren't the same. Picture me sitting with you, telling you everything will be okay 💜

Did you and your team come up with some kind of plan or steps for safety tomorrow? Anything we can do to add to it?

No @Jynx they didn’t. None of them did. 😩 which is why I feel so very alone.

@Bow oh that is rough. Makes me a lil mad if I'm being honest. Is there anything we could work out together that could help? Does your CM know about the anniversary, and are you seeing them or anyone else tomorrow?