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Something’s not right

Need to vent

Need to vent

Hi everyone

I need to vent!!

I'm not coping

I'm not enjoying my new job. It's mundane, boring and triggering. For those who don't know, I was made redundant in my pharmacy job 4 days before Christmas. I then found a casual job at a supermarket. The job I do is very boring. I have far too much 'alone' time at work so my mind wanders to a lot of stuff. I asked my supervisor if i could learn the registers as thats what i would love to do. she replied that she couldn't until next year, don't know why as we are so short staffed and they need extras.

They advertise extra shifts or replacing a shift on facebook, which i really hate. but that's how they do it. i asked my supervisor if i could pick up extra shifts even though i don't know the registers. she replied yes thats fine that i would still do cleaning.

The other day a staff member posted she needed someone to do a shift. i was the first one tyo reply and accept the shift. another girl replied after me. the staff member replied back to me saying she would give that shift to the second girl as i don't know tyhe registers. I was so annoyed, angry and then upset. I feel used, and discriminated.

The problem is I am 'too scared' to confront my supervisor and ask again as i don't want the other member to get into gtrouble. so this means that i can't get any extra shifts until i learn the registers.

it is so wrong

the other issue i am having is seeing the old pharmacy customers. it's not an issue in that i see them, they love to talk. some still didn't know i had gone!!! but each time i see them and they say 'oh i am sorry to what happened to you' i get upset, hurt angry at the new owners. i miss the girls i used to work with and the job.

working for a much much bigger organisation is hard. there is so much clicks, so much politics and crap. i try to go in and do my job and go home.

but with so much time on my hands at work i start to think negatively.

i have recentyly had terrible vertigo, a 5 day migraine and today again another headache. i decided to call in sick and was spoken to so rude and short by the supervisor. it's like she doesn't believe me when i call in sick. and my anxiety is extremely high in having to ring her.

i don't have the confidence to leave and get another job. i feel i am not good enough

i am sorry to vent, i know a lot of you are struggling with your own issues. and that i should be thankful that i do have a job, as a lot of people have lost theirs.

4898 replies

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In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay 💙💙💙

In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hi @BlueBay
What can you do this morning to switch off? To unwind and try to get past it?

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

hugs my sister @BlueBay

In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

To: SANE Forums <team@saneforums.org>
Subject: Re: Need to vent

You are somebody. You are someone. What happened to you wasn’t your choice or your.responsibility. I know you feel alone in your despair. I’m glad you say how you feel. It makes me feel less alone. You are loved. I believe love is the strongest thing in the universe. When I’m down I get so lonely I find it impossible to remember that I’m a person too just like everyone else. I’m crying for you Blue

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Thankyou for your support and love @grayhorn @Shaz51 @MDT @Maggie @Emelia8 @Snowie

ive been sitting around feeling horrible.
I'm now going to Bunnings to buy some veg seedlings.

I found a lump in my stomach that's causing pain. I'm not going to wirk in Monday. Just made an appointment online to see my doctor Monday mirning.
I'm worried.
@Emelia yes I miss my dad very much. Hoping our premiere extends the restrictions tomorrow.
I feel horrible. A bit lost and a bit stuck.
I really don't know.

In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

I'm so sorry your life is so bleak and terrible @BlueBay

Honestly - there seems to be no joy in it anywhere - how miserable you must feel and how conflicted

Is there anything we can say to help or do you just need to vent?

But I have thought of something - when you next wish to self-harm or worse - remember your fear about this bad nightmare - your life is still important to you and you are important to us - I have been thinking about you for hours today - it's really rotten that your past is so empty apart from your abuse and I really wish I could say something helpful

Except maybe this - I really think childhood is not what people often believe - we are little and helpless with no choices - where's the fun in that?

Thinking of you

Dec

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

I'm not my f...g mum

you change your story around and it's my fault

how dare you say "you're just like your mum"

WTF I AM NOT LIKE MY MUM

I AM NOT MY MUM NEVER

I can't talk right now

I'm furious

im about to rip into things

f...k why me 😢😢😢

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hi @BlueBay ,

I'm sorry to hear that you are experiencing some distress today and that it's all sitting so difficultly, these can be some very tricky feelings to manage. I'm just checking in based off your post today, I'm wondering if it would be helpful, would you consider giving Suicide Call Back Service or Lifeline or another crisis line of preference a ring if you were after some instantaneous support or would like to have a chat to someone?

With the upmost care and gratitude,

Otter

In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay can definitely relate to being 'stuck' in retail

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

I'm not my mum

@Otter

why am I being tarnished like my mum

im so angry

I hate this world

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