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Something’s not right

Need to vent

Need to vent

Hi everyone

I need to vent!!

I'm not coping

I'm not enjoying my new job. It's mundane, boring and triggering. For those who don't know, I was made redundant in my pharmacy job 4 days before Christmas. I then found a casual job at a supermarket. The job I do is very boring. I have far too much 'alone' time at work so my mind wanders to a lot of stuff. I asked my supervisor if i could learn the registers as thats what i would love to do. she replied that she couldn't until next year, don't know why as we are so short staffed and they need extras.

They advertise extra shifts or replacing a shift on facebook, which i really hate. but that's how they do it. i asked my supervisor if i could pick up extra shifts even though i don't know the registers. she replied yes thats fine that i would still do cleaning.

The other day a staff member posted she needed someone to do a shift. i was the first one tyo reply and accept the shift. another girl replied after me. the staff member replied back to me saying she would give that shift to the second girl as i don't know tyhe registers. I was so annoyed, angry and then upset. I feel used, and discriminated.

The problem is I am 'too scared' to confront my supervisor and ask again as i don't want the other member to get into gtrouble. so this means that i can't get any extra shifts until i learn the registers.

it is so wrong

the other issue i am having is seeing the old pharmacy customers. it's not an issue in that i see them, they love to talk. some still didn't know i had gone!!! but each time i see them and they say 'oh i am sorry to what happened to you' i get upset, hurt angry at the new owners. i miss the girls i used to work with and the job.

working for a much much bigger organisation is hard. there is so much clicks, so much politics and crap. i try to go in and do my job and go home.

but with so much time on my hands at work i start to think negatively.

i have recentyly had terrible vertigo, a 5 day migraine and today again another headache. i decided to call in sick and was spoken to so rude and short by the supervisor. it's like she doesn't believe me when i call in sick. and my anxiety is extremely high in having to ring her.

i don't have the confidence to leave and get another job. i feel i am not good enough

i am sorry to vent, i know a lot of you are struggling with your own issues. and that i should be thankful that i do have a job, as a lot of people have lost theirs.

4898 replies

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In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

i think this is where i struggle a lot @tyme that if something unexpected happens then i feel i am a failure, or it's bad. I never say to myself 'it's ok if i am not ok'

it's like i am either sick or not coping or good and then if i feel good then how can i go back down again to not good.

does this make sense??

hugs @Snowie @Former-Member xxxooo

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

I most definitely understand what you are saying @BlueBay . I always thought that if i felt bad or down, it meant I had failed in some way or was innately 'bad' - and that's why these things happened to me.

After learning to accept that a good life doesn't mean you always have to be 'happy', I was able to then accept the downs in life and see them as a normal part of existence.

Now, I would NEVER ask for a problem-free life. I think 'problems' help us grow and mature. It will also help us help others in the future!

tyme

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

yes!!! i totally get it @tyme that's exactly how i feel

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay

Yes I so get that one. I used to feel when things were going well that I’d finally got it right, and when something went sideways I would be shocked and down, and take it personally. Obviously it doesn’t mean it’s all cool now but it’s a little easier to cope💜

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

♥️ @grayhorn

i am definitely a very black and white person.
how do I change - learn to accept things are not always good or bad; right or wrong.

i can’t deal with some very very stressful issues at the moment.
It’s really triggering stuff snd increasing my anxiety.
all I can think of is very negative thoughts.

im sorry I shouldn’t be on here writing stuff.
im sorry.

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@tyme are you around ?

i don’t know how to stop stressing ruminating over a lot

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hey @BlueBay ,

Yes, I'm right here, ready and listening.

It sounds like tonight is not a good night - and that's okay.

Have you every tried to change the weather? Try and you might, hope as you might, work on it as you might - the weather won't change at your command. Instead, let's dress appropriately for the weather.

So tonight, try as you might, hope as you might, work on it as you might - your mood won't change at your command. Instead, let's work towards accepting it the way it is, and enjoy saviour every moment.

I had to learn the above lesson - it took years. My once black and white thinking has gradually shifted to - things might seem black, but that's okay.

Hugs, hugs, hugs to you,

tyme

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

It’s hard to sit this @tyme

I’m sorry I’m really not good

not able to comprehend what you wrote

Feeling like a complete loser tonight

wanting yo really numb all my stress and worries

just really want to shut it all out forever


maybe I should go to bed

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay

Please don’t be so hard on yourself. Everyone feels incredibly stressed when finances are too tight, and selling one’s home, also stressful. So be extra gentle, extra kind, extra tender to that part of you that is suffering. Thinking of you 🌹

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Dear @BlueBay ,

I'm not sure about you, but for me, going to bed is like a reset button for me. I wake up either in a good or bad mood. Does this happen for you?

It's getting late now, so perhaps having a rest tonight is the best? What do you think?

Big hugs to you,

tyme

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