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Something’s not right

Need to vent

Need to vent

Hi everyone

I need to vent!!

I'm not coping

I'm not enjoying my new job. It's mundane, boring and triggering. For those who don't know, I was made redundant in my pharmacy job 4 days before Christmas. I then found a casual job at a supermarket. The job I do is very boring. I have far too much 'alone' time at work so my mind wanders to a lot of stuff. I asked my supervisor if i could learn the registers as thats what i would love to do. she replied that she couldn't until next year, don't know why as we are so short staffed and they need extras.

They advertise extra shifts or replacing a shift on facebook, which i really hate. but that's how they do it. i asked my supervisor if i could pick up extra shifts even though i don't know the registers. she replied yes thats fine that i would still do cleaning.

The other day a staff member posted she needed someone to do a shift. i was the first one tyo reply and accept the shift. another girl replied after me. the staff member replied back to me saying she would give that shift to the second girl as i don't know tyhe registers. I was so annoyed, angry and then upset. I feel used, and discriminated.

The problem is I am 'too scared' to confront my supervisor and ask again as i don't want the other member to get into gtrouble. so this means that i can't get any extra shifts until i learn the registers.

it is so wrong

the other issue i am having is seeing the old pharmacy customers. it's not an issue in that i see them, they love to talk. some still didn't know i had gone!!! but each time i see them and they say 'oh i am sorry to what happened to you' i get upset, hurt angry at the new owners. i miss the girls i used to work with and the job.

working for a much much bigger organisation is hard. there is so much clicks, so much politics and crap. i try to go in and do my job and go home.

but with so much time on my hands at work i start to think negatively.

i have recentyly had terrible vertigo, a 5 day migraine and today again another headache. i decided to call in sick and was spoken to so rude and short by the supervisor. it's like she doesn't believe me when i call in sick. and my anxiety is extremely high in having to ring her.

i don't have the confidence to leave and get another job. i feel i am not good enough

i am sorry to vent, i know a lot of you are struggling with your own issues. and that i should be thankful that i do have a job, as a lot of people have lost theirs.

4898 replies

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In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hi @BPDSurvivor @Shaz51 @oceangirl @grayhorn @Anastasia @Snowie @Emelia8 and others following

home now. Saw my dad. Got my hug. My mum was a bit cold towards me

wouldn’t even give me a kiss hello or hug. Not that I cared much about her. She said she wasn’t well. Although I don't think she had a cold at all. I kept feeling that she was giving me “the up and down look”.
Our boys came as they haven’t seen my dad for a while. My dad was telling my younger son when he goes overseas to visit his hometown and will see his sister who can show him the house my dad was born in.
my son said yes he’ll def go. My Aunty is 90 but she has lots of grandchildren that will show my son around the village.

the disappointing thing with my parents is that they didn’t ask about my daughter or little A. I’m so hurt. My dad used to ask all the time. But I bet my mum told him not to ask.

but my dad looks ok. He is still adjusting to new meds and is seeing his doctor tomorrow.

i always feel judged when I go there. It’s a horrible feeling to have from your own mother.

well I got to see dad. I now won’t ring very often.

feeling a bit emotional this afternoon. We had another 6 people through our open house this morning. But still no offers.
I’m stressing. It’s getting all too much.

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Soo glad that you and the boys saw your dad today @BlueBay xx

A step at a time my sister

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

So glad the visit with your Dad went well @BlueBay

Hopefully you can see him again soon 💕

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay Glad your visit went well with your dad. Perhaps ask your dad to call you?. What are you up to tomorrow?

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay @I’m so happy for you BB, a hug from your dad and him talking to your son about your dad’s family back home. I’m sad about your mum’s coldness, she’s the one missing out. You are made of different stuff than her, you have nurtured a loving family.

Your house will sell when the time is right meantime enjoy the people and places you love.
hugs 🌷

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Not doing good tonight

I feel life is just too hard and I’m not sure I want to keep going

I’m overwhelmed anxious depressed and unmotivated

can’t be bothered

confidence for living is zero

@grayhorn @oceangirl @Snowie @Shaz51 @BPDSurvivor @Emelia8 @Owlunar @MDT and others

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hi @BlueBay

I'm really glad you've shared how you're feeling tonight. Those are some really heavy thoughts and feelings and I'm glad we can all sit next to you now, knowing what you're feeling ❤️

Overwhelm, anxiety and depression can often bring up strong feelings of hopelessness and SI for many people. When you are feeling you have zero confidence in living, its really important you get qualified help beyond a peer support service as these forums are not a crisis service. We’d recommend you take a break from the forums right now and reach out to SCBS on 1300 659 467 or Lifeline on 13 11 14.

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay Sad to hear things are feeling tough BB. Growing up without being nurtured and treasured, we might learn to nurture and treasure others but forget to care for ourselves during hard times. You’re so kind to others, just remember how powerful it is to be gentle and kind to yourself. Hugs 🌹

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Dear @BlueBay ,

Sorry to hear how tough it is for you tonight.

I know it has been hard dealing with all the emotions that came with visiting your family and with your house being on the market.

I just want you to know that although you feel you ‘don’t matter’ to your mother, you DO matter to your beautiful children and Little A. They would all be lost without you.

Life is worth living even if it is for them.

Hugs,

BPDSurvivor

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay Sorry to hear you are having a tough time tonight. Hope tomorrow is better for you. I am off to bed. Talk to you soon !!

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