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zipperSenior Contributor
Hello ladies
I am a wife who has had a husband with depression for 10 years now. He has had multiple hospitalisations, long series of ECT's, and is now not able to work. I would love to hear from ladies who have been, are in, my shoes and was wondering if you would answer a few questions for me.
1. Where have you needed the most help, and, could you find it?
2. What has been your hardest struggle?
thanks in advance and all my best wishes
ZZ
In response to: Wives caring for Husbands
TootsySenior Contributor
@AlwaysMyself @ thank you for support, i get all that you have said and yes retaliation is my biggest concern
I struggle with his moods a lot lately and on his good days i understand its his condtion but i still struggle on his bad days which are frequent now. He says no one understands him. He has no one else as he has alienated everyone in his life. He has nowhere to go and is on dsp so i feel obliged i guess is the word to try and hang on. He has a good heart but his head is a mess
In response to: Re: Wives caring for Husbands
AlwaysMyselfSenior Contributor
*safe virtual hugs @Tootsy * I wish I knew what to say. But I hear you, and I'm really sorry for the very difficult and stressful situation you are in. Between a rock and a hard place.
He is struggling because of his condition(s), but it is also his responsibility if he chooses to co-habit to ensure his own behaviours (including verbal) are safe and respectful.
Do you think he is aware that he is being threatening and abusive?
Do you know if he is aware of the behaviours (whether or not he acknowledges them as threats/abuse or not) and is working with his supports/psych to try to change/improve them?
I hope you are safe, and are able to get out of the house whenever you do not feel safe (even if its just a few hours until he calms down or whatever is the best descriptor for his bad time).
Here for you to chat about things if that helps at all. (Even if sometimes I have a delay in responding for a day or two)
In response to: Re: Wives caring for Husbands
Shaz51Senior Contributor
Hello @AlwaysMyself , @zipper , @Tootsy , @Fullofhope79 , @Healandlove
Sending you lots of hugs and sitting with you my friends 🧡
How is everything going
In response to: Re: Wives caring for Husbands
TootsySenior Contributor
Hello @Shaz51 @zipper @AlwaysMyself @Fullofhope79 @tyme wow has it been that long since ive been on! What a year....just an update, police had to get involved because of DV and I left in January with nothing but the clothes I had on for work. I am now staying at my sisters and have been able to get my things. But what a gut wrenching time it has been. Im slowly feeling better. I think it will take a lot of therapy though. Hope you are all doing ok. Thinking of you all ❤️💜
In response to: Re: Wives caring for Husbands
AlwaysMyselfSenior Contributor
@Tootsy great to hear an update from you, thank you.
I'm sorry its still a hard road to travel and hoe badly you were treated, but I am encouraged and proud of your steps this year to leave and be safe and rebuild yourself.
I hope your sister, the police, DV supports, therapists and friends are good healthy supports in their various roles to help you move forward, process, feel justice (if you want/need it), and find who you are - your value, your worth, your life. 💜
I would be interested to knowing how it goes for you, but of course only if you want to share and its helpful for you. Do let us know if there are was on here we can support or things that help you by chatting through and/or being heard, for example.
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
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