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Changing meds

WIPSenior Contributor15 July 2020, 11:14 am AEST

Changing meds

Hi. I battled MDD & acute anxiety nearly all of my adult life. I've been on numerous different SSRIs, SRNIs, antipsychotics, tried rTMS & ECT. Am addicted to a benzo for my anxiety.

I am in the process of swapping out from a SRNI to a MAOI and the wash out period is hell. I really don't think I'm going to make it. This is the darkest place I have ever been.
I have no family support, honestly no friends, not able to work & are completely isolated.

i don't feel my medical team actually care much anymore, they are overwhelmed by new clients because of covid.

i hardly sleep, but the last thing in my mind before I do, is how much I want to die. It's the first thought of the day when I wake up.

what if this new medication doesn't work either??

2972 replies

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In response to: Changing meds

Emelia8Senior Contributor02 Jan 2021, 5:08 pm AEDT

Re: Changing meds

@WIP 😔💕 Hold on tight sweetheart, and hold onto the hope that tomorrow will be better.

In response to: Changing meds

Eve7Senior Contributor02 Jan 2021, 5:14 pm AEDT

Re: Changing meds

Hugs @WIP

🤗 🤗

In response to: Changing meds

Shaz51Senior Contributor02 Jan 2021, 5:20 pm AEDT

Re: Changing meds

@WIP here sitting with you my friend xxx

Like @Jynx said , ❤❤🥰☕☕

In response to: Re: Changing meds

WIPSenior Contributor02 Jan 2021, 5:22 pm AEDT

Re: Changing meds

But tomorrow never is any better @Emelia8 Em, that's my struggle, it's relentless

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Shaz51Senior Contributor02 Jan 2021, 5:35 pm AEDT

Re: Changing meds

Sending you understanding hugs @WIP

My Mr shaz would agree with you , but keep on keeping on my friend

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Emelia8Senior Contributor02 Jan 2021, 5:38 pm AEDT

Re: Changing meds

Yes @WIP I understand why you feel that way. It must seem so relentless for you.

What are you saying ... that tomorrow never comes for you?

Dont forget that you have made recent progress. You now have very competent MH support, something you didnt have before. So that is progress, and further progress will follow, fear not.

Emelia 💞

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Eve7Senior Contributor02 Jan 2021, 5:45 pm AEDT

Re: Changing meds

I feel that way too @WIP about tomorrow. My pdoc says to get through today’s moments first...baby steps and mindfulness. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.

🦋🤗🦋

In response to: Re: Changing meds

WIPSenior Contributor02 Jan 2021, 6:08 pm AEDT

Re: Changing meds

Maybe Em, @Emelia8 but I'm at crisis point at the moment & just don't have belief tomorrow would be better. I've had 1 non crisis day this week. I'm worried I'm going to act further on my thoughts. I can't calm down, I'm at an10'raring with my distress. I'm so very alone. Bringing in another year in exactly the same spot health wise, if not worse is all I think about.

i called a crisis support line - not much help!

In response to: Re: Changing meds

JynxModerator02 Jan 2021, 6:13 pm AEDT

Re: Changing meds

Hi @WIP, I'm so sorry you're at this point. It's really good you're reaching out if you're in crisis, I'm sorry that your experience with a helpline wasn't too helpful. I'm glad you're talking about it here, so that we can be with you in this moment. Maybe when you're feeling up to it, you could try a different crisis line?
Even though you feel alone, please know that you aren't. I'm genuinely concerned about you, and want to help you in accessing what you need in this moment.

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Shaz51Senior Contributor02 Jan 2021, 6:15 pm AEDT

Re: Changing meds

Ohhh @WIP , I wish I was there with you and give you a reassuring hugs

Have you had something to eat or have a cuppa

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