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I don't know why I am really writing this. There seems to be part of me which says that I need to pull my head in and do this alone and another part who so desperately wants to reach out for help. I am really struggling. I'm not coping at all. For much of the day I've thought about all the reasons to die and there are hundreds. There is also one reason to live that keeps me here. I can't let down my oldest son and cut out his trip of a lifetime. He would have to come home and pick up all the pieces for everyone. I keep telling myself I have to hold on until he comes back and then I can let go but this keeps me waiting to die not choosing to live. I have a cold sore that now goes from the corner of my eye the length of my nose and it's slowly creeping across my face from stress. It started on Wednesday and each morning I wake to find more of my face engulfed by it. I am so tired. I am so sorry to write this and I know I'm so lucky to have friends on here that care. I don't want anyone to have to deal with this as it is so depressing so I started this thread as a way of saying that I'm not well when writing here and please don't feel obliged to read or respond.
Hello There @Former-Member, @Former-Member, @Former-Member, @Pepsimax
In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment
Unknown userMember
Re: I am struggling at the moment
Hello @Former-Member! How is your afternoon going? 🙂
Oh and hi @Shaz51, are you having a good afternoon?
In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment
BlueBaySenior Contributor
Re: I am struggling at the moment
Hi @Former-Member@Former-Member@Shaz51@Former-Member@Pepsimax
Hope everyone is doing okay this afternoon. It's pretty warm where I live and lots of tourists invading my beach!!! LOL 😞
So now I can't go so i will sit with a coffee and chocolate and rest 🙂
In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment
Unknown userMember
Re: I am struggling at the moment
It sounds like you had a nice catch up with your friend over lunch @BlueBay, I think a cuppa + chocolate and a rest sounds so nice, I am jealous! 🙂
In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment
Shaz51Senior Contributor
Re: I am struggling at the moment
Hey hello @BlueBay xoxo
Hello @Former-Member
relaxing , the afternoon is getting darker and darker , we might get some rain
In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment
HappynessSenior Contributor
Re: I am struggling at the moment
I'm Clearing Out My Cuboard Of Lot Of Food And Giving It To Charity Through A Chuch Contact
And Stocking Up On Food Items That I Can Actualy Use
Money Does't Really Make Me Happy At All
And It Feels Like An Act Of Compassion
How Is Everyone Feeling Today About Summer
In response to: I am struggling at the moment
Unknown userMember
Re: I am struggling at the moment
Hi there @Former-Member, gosh you s it afternoon already? How is your day? I'm not sure how I feel. Mother tx saying she's lost another 5kg with the terminal cancer 57 from 72kg in a year) and dad can hardly walk and I want to visit the culture traumatises me & travelling 1200k hard. Then I get a call I got a p/t job shop assist start tomorrow (that's good), tbend I went to find something to wear and I look so FAT in everything and Im crashed on the bed crying, disgusted in myself and hopelessness and heaviness and pain of it all. Sorry I'm not happier right now. Taking a minute, again, I'll get up soon. What is nice in the now is listening to the beautiful Currawongs calling each other, one from my big tree - just beautiful!
In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment
Unknown userMember
Re: I am struggling at the moment
Hi @Happyness
sounds like a lovely thing to do re the food.
we might actually get to 29 today! then we'll have two days over 30! will be nice, might take kids to the beach which is only a 30 min drive away. they will love that.
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