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Something’s not right

I am struggling at the moment

I am struggling at the moment

I don't know why I am really writing this. There seems to be part of me which says that I need to pull my head in and do this alone and another part who so desperately wants to reach out for help. I am really struggling. I'm not coping at all. For much of the day I've thought about all the reasons to die and there are hundreds. There is also one reason to live that keeps me here. I can't let down my oldest son and cut out his trip of a lifetime. He would have to come home and pick up all the pieces for everyone. I keep telling myself I have to hold on until he comes back and then I can let go but this keeps me waiting to die not choosing to live. I have a cold sore that now goes from the corner of my eye the length of my nose and it's slowly creeping across my face from stress. It started on Wednesday and each morning I wake to find more of my face engulfed by it. I am so tired. I am so sorry to write this and I know I'm so lucky to have friends on here that care. I don't want anyone to have to deal with this as it is so depressing so I started this thread as a way of saying that I'm not well when writing here and please don't feel obliged to read or respond.

3364 replies

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In response to: I am struggling at the moment

Re: I am struggling at the moment

Ive had many days when didn't want to or thought could do anything.. then after dragging self to shower kicked self for not doing it earlier.. sometimes that lead to mad tidying and dishwashing.. made me feel better not seeing mess.
That would be a good thing if you could do that @Former-Member.. soap and warm water work miracles..😀

In response to: I am struggling at the moment

Re: I am struggling at the moment

As soon as you feel able to @Former-Member, put SOMETHING back into order in your house .... don't care if it's pushing a chair back in under the table, washing a single dish, cleaning your teeth, straightening up a pillow .... anything .... anything at all. Just make any small move towards putting order together, breaking the inertia ....

C'mon my girl .... you can do it .....

❤️ n 🤗💕

In response to: I am struggling at the moment

Re: I am struggling at the moment

Teej look after yourself don't take anything extra just your regular tablets even though I don't post much I read them all take care Pepsimax

In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment

Re: I am struggling at the moment

Ok @Faith-and-Hope, @TAB you drive a hard bargain, maybe a shower and some washing on.

Thank you @Faith-and-Hope. Your persistence has helped me calm down. I even just hugged the dog 💜 I've been struggling with him which is always a sign things are really bad. He won't leave my side at the moment.

and for now there is a little peace in my head. It was soo noisy before. I'll try to behave again. My youngest has just come home now with his girlfriend so that's a buffer for now.

Love and hugs to you both💜🤗😘

In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment

Re: I am struggling at the moment

Thanks @Pepsimax,

how are you going now? Are you ok?

In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment

Re: I am struggling at the moment

..shower and clean clothes okay @Former-Member

In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment

Re: I am struggling at the moment

Hi @Former-Member

I'm glad to read you are feeling a little calmer. Just try to take slow deep breaths. Pets are amazing aren't they. They know when we are not coping andn will stay by your side.

Thinking of you,

In response to: I am struggling at the moment

Re: I am struggling at the moment

I feel much better now thanks Christmas over (thankfully)do what has been suggested just one

In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment

Re: I am struggling at the moment

Yeah the washing is so I'll have some clean clothes @TAB, I haven't been out of PJs for days. Seriously testing personal hygiene here right now 😳. Best if I wash some clothes to wear. I'm glad you survived your trip. Sorry I couldn't be there so much for you. You're a survivor @TAB. It's a strength in you 💜🤗

In response to: Re: I am struggling at the moment

Re: I am struggling at the moment

..that's alright @Former-Member Ms Survivor or was that lady godiva re no clean clothes and doing washing lol

1,321 - 1,330 of 3,364