Medication blues

Hi @Former-Member. Wow they are long hours you are working in an office. What are your normal work hiurs (say 8.30 -5.00). Why are you now worjing longer. Is it just temporary or is ut undedstaffed where youcwork.

@1stepup61 and @utopia thanks for getting back to me, I've had a reasonable night's sleep and feeling less strung out.
You're right, too many hours don't help but hopefully it's a situation that won't be forever. We're implementing frequent project roll outs just now, until September so there's still a couple of months to go. Taking a holiday now isn't feasible plus, as a contractor, it stresses me out even more to lose pay!
But I need to look after myself better, otherwise I won't last the distance. My work colleagues are very supportive and know I've had depression before (I gave a staff presentation on emotional resilience - ironic!) but they don't know about the BPD, as I've lost a job before by disclosing it.
Anyway, thank you for your wonderful support and wise words - today will be a better day!

Hi @Charli. So what do you think you will do about the medication? This current meds you're on - the old one - would it work better without the increase in work stress? If so, you may need to talk to your boss about not being able to do so much overtime. Just say it can effect your depression - so you don't want to over do it. No need to mention any other MI.
Good luck and let us know how you get on.

Hi @utopia, I function better on the current meds than on the previous nasty one, especially as my job needs me to be high energy. I'm not in a fog now, which I was before.
I think it was really a perfect storm of multiple stressors hitting all at the same time! One aspect of work stress has stopped, as I completed a project that someone else was raising a fuss about not being completed. Still lots to do for other projects but I'm eating the elephant one bite at a time!
The family stress will also reduce when the toxic sibling goes back home to overseas.
So overall, today was a much better day. And I'm wearing pink flamingo flannie PJs - nobody can be down wearing these!
Thank you so much for listening and for your generous heart and to @1stepup61 too - I made it through to the other side.

@Charli. I get the overload of stress. Glad it's being reduced. And those PJ's. lol.
I'm wearing my snow Leopard PJ's. Too cild for anything else.
Enjoy the rest of your week.

Hi Charli
Reading your post I see a lot of myself in your words n I visualise how I've dealt with my the stresses of work, family not quite getting my plight n just trying to get through each day with even just one smile.
Each day I'm happy I embrace wholeheartedly n enjoy n laugh with colleagues n friends n think many positive thoughts.
Stress is something we all suffer but some of us just can't hack it like others
I've found a few things that have really helped me over the years of dealing with Bipolar 1 Disorder.
Meditation - it's an essential n enjoyable part of my routine now, usually daily. We must calm our minds so we can deal with the day to day interruptions ie life
It's not something I picked up straight away but I'm learning n getting better at it. There are some wonderful audios out there n I've found Synchronicity Meditation 10 very good plus I have a Kasina machine which really helps. I'll let you look that up. But it's fantastic suffice to say.
Gut health is paramount to mental health n I entice you to look into what foods are causing you what reactions.
Over the years I've learned that Gluten n Dairy are not my friends - learning the hard way of course n I've finally after 30 years learned that alcohol is not my friend either.
I'm not saying I'll never drink again but if I do it'll be organic so as not to add even more toxins to my already stressed body n I won't have too much.
I've gone 7 months almost so far this year n the benefits far outway the momentary relief from pain n suffering when having a drink.
I have also done a lot of looking into my health n how I can help myself over the years, both conventional n natural n I've recently had my DNA tested n I cannot recommend this more highly.
It has completely changed my life in terms of knowing why I am the way I am n why I've done all those things that I can't change.
If you would like more details let me know but I've found out why my body was prone to BP1 why my weight has fluctuated from a size 10 to a size 22 why I've been able to lose 30-41 kgs 5 times yet to put it all back on n why my body has so much inflammation that the smallest things set me off. It all now makes sense...very empowering

I wish you you every success in finding your happiness n I know how tough it is to balance work with lifestyle by please make time for yourself n you will get there

Take care

Wow @Lily1972! That's amazing, learning to look after yourself better. I honestly think getting my diagnosis was the best thing that ever happened to me - it made me look at myself more closely (not in a self-obsessed way!) and consider more carefully how certain things, people and situations would make me feel. I've got to know and understand myself a lot better and I do believe it's made me a better person.
I'm more understanding of other people, more tolerant of differences and more compassionate.
I'm in a very privileged position, as I can afford to pay to see my doctor, I can pay for my meds. Many others can't and often have to choose between meds and food, for themselves or their family.
Your experience is inspiring - I've taken similar steps with what I eat and drink, stepped up my exercise and practise mindfulness. Mediation doesn't work that well for me, I'm a terrible fidget! But calmness is important and I make sure my weekends at home are relaxed with family, before I fly back to work another hectic week. Weird schedule, but it works for me!
I really appreciate your openness and generosity in sharing your experience - it's good to know I'm not alone in this - none of us are.

Hi Charli<br>It's great to be able to connect n communicate with people coping with similar issues. <br>I guess I went for many years just thinking I was a full on person n as some people called me - hard work. And when my Dad passed away after a very sad time suffering from Cancer the stress n trauma triggered the Bipolar. <br>It's a steep learning curve n I learn something new about myself my illness, people n how they deal with the stigma of mental illness everyday n my journey n how I shall follow my own path. <br>I have learned not to allow other people's insecurities n misconception n misunderstanding of disorders such as mine n stay true to my own journey. <br>It's by no means been easy but I know in my heart I am doing the right thing. <br>I also know that I am only one small step away from those mostly kind n lovely homeless people I meet n talk to n help in a small way. Without my family, friends n works' support I too would be in their situation. I know this in my heart. <br>Life has decided I am meant to be on this path n I try to be there for others who need a friend an ear or a shoulder or some advice. <br>I know we are all different n we have to find what works for ourselves. All I can do is do my best n go with my gut and/or my heart. <br>I'm presently going through a time of withdrawal coming off some meds <br>As most people know who've done it it can be pretty tough going but I'm determined to push through it. Longevity is important to me as we were unable to have our own children I really want to see my 15 nieces n nephews n friends kids grow up n become beautiful special people. <br>I've had some very honest conversations with my Psychiatrist n other Heath Professionals (I have 😎 n I've found my way of being as healthy as possible n on as little meds as I can. <br>It's scary at times but that's life isn't it. Sometimes fear is what we need to drive us to do what's most important or best for us. <br>So one day at a time. I wish anyone suffering any type of illness much love n strength n I hope all can find their own path. <br>Good luck n much love hugs smiles n laughter<br>Lily1972<br>:)