Need advice please (info below).

@Blep thanks. I tried not to take it to heart and tried to think of things you said like he could've been unwell, busy, etc. Could've been heaps of reasons, I hope he's ok either way. Sorry for all of my long rambling comments (I do this often sorry).

He said I should complain but didn't say how to, but I do know of places to complain to, and I told him my parents told me to tell you although I was going to anyway, and he said fair enough, and that he doesn't condone the Nurse's behaviour, it's unacceptable, and so forth.

However as I mentioned, he was writing things down in a hurry and looked angry (at the Nurse I hope and assume) and asked me to repeat myself because I was talking fast due to anxiety and wanted to say everything so I apologised and said I do that a lot.

About the 20 min session, yes it is short, but usually he gives me more time, every other time he says "is there anything else you want to talk to me or ask me about?" and sometimes I say yes, sometimes no. He didn't even ask that today, was just that I should do something to occupy myself etc and I told him I'm too scared because of my PTSD and other diagnoseses like depression, paranoia, anxiety & whatnot, and that it's a lot to take into consideration. I've told him this before, I know he's trying to help however. I'm just having mixed emotions really. I don't have a problem with him and I haven't since.

I have asked the Telehealth company (you have to call them to book an appointment) if I can have an hour long session but they said no, his reviews are only for 20 or 30 mins, it's just new patients and the 1st session with him is an hour (I've only had that 1 hour appointment with him when I saw him for the first time). Fair enough I guess, I suppose he is busy.

However he's done stuff for me in the past and still does which I appreciate although I feel like such a burden and that I annoy him, but I was thinking I could try to ask him for an hour appointment one day, but I don't want to push it. I tell the people (or my Mum does if she calls for me because they needed permission and I gave her and them my permission for her to call for me to make appointments) on the phone that he agreed to see me every 2-3 weeks now (I hope thats still the case but he didn't say no and hasn't cancelled anything so yeah) and they don't question anything.

@Former-Member @Bezak482 @outlander @Blep thanks for the kind words and wishes once again, about the meds too. I hope things go well too. Just waiting to hear back from him and the person from the Telehealth company will let me know. He's replied to them and then she's told me about meds before so hopefully he replies again, or one time he made an appointment the next day without me even asking. Yes he could be unwell or other reasons, I hope he's ok regardless and not mad at me.

Also @Former-Member I'm glad he didn't cancel too, I guess that was being considerate of me, I would've understood though. Would you agree Dizzy, or any of you?

Definitely being understanding that sometimes even our MH professionals need to take time for their health is a good thing. I hope he replies to your email my friend. @Former-Member

@Former-Member thats true. I'd say that he was being considerate of me and didn't want me missing my appointment so he was being caring, but I would've understood if he cancelled. Would you agree with that? I appreciate that.

Oh wait no I don't, not according to that rude Nurse, I don't appreciate anything he does for me. That's just crap because I appreciate EVERYTHING my Psychiatrist has done, and just him in general as a therapist. Ugh.

Thanks I'll keep you updated, will probably reply tomorrow or maybe he did tonight but I'll probably get notified tomorrow.

@Former-Member I can see you have had a tricky afternoon and thought this would be the best thread to reach you. Let me say from the outset that I hear what you are going through and it must feel with AVPD that everyone and everything is rejecting you or ignoring you. That is not the case but in your mind that is what you are seeing and that is what you are feeling.

It is great that you want to support/help others but in giving that support (from anyone) it is so important that we then do not place ourselves at the middle of any scenario. By that I mean when we begin to talk about ourselves it is in the context of what we have lived in the same/similar situation – it is relating to others through our own lived experience in a way that supports the other person without making it personal or about ourselves. A part of supporting others sometimes also means taking a step back, understanding that others have a greater connection, ability to empathise and/or reach that person through their own history or time together. This may seem to you like you are being left out but in these situations it is not about you – it is about that person that needs that support in whatever way THEY need it in that moment. This does not translate to you being ignored – it is simply that connections are very important in these times as often those we have become close to know what is needed.

I also hear that you want/need those kind of connections yourself – this is something that may come in time – they cannot be forced nor can they be presumed. Those connections and friendships that many do have on here have been developed over time, some years. Trying to force that is actually keeping you at a distance as it is both alienating and uncomfortable for some to be feeling they have to interact – especially when they themselves are not doing so well. It adds a new layer of stress on people when the centre of the conversation is no longer about their distress and how they can work through it. This is why, for some, they stay in the background, sit with those dealing with what they are but letting them know you are there and listening – that is just as powerful as contributing to the discussion. It is imperative that we do not project our own ‘issues’ onto others in this situation because that does not serve anyone well and could actually make those seeking that support withdraw from receiving it.

What I am saying here, not very succinctly, is sometimes we need to stay in the background for the benefit of the situation and not perceive a lack of interaction as a rejection or being left out. You will build relationships up as you interact here but they need to be done by getting to know people, understanding their personal situations, identifying the close relationships some have built up and by taking the time to get to know what works best and can help others. This you too can develop over time but please give yourself that time to do so. You are most welcome here and your support is valued but I feel for you to gain the best experience from the forum you also need to take the time to work with us. A great start might be sticking to one or two threads – building up your own supports where you can talk, interact and connect with members. In this way you will have a place you can receive support, people can get to know you a bit better, understand what it is you are going through and reach out their hand of support just for you. In a way it is creating your own little bubble where you can feel safe, wanted and supported. Those that are able to will readily provide that hand and will be more than happy to sit beside you.

You are not alone and you do matter - so let us work with you to make your experience (and others here) as supportive and as comfortable as possible.

Zoe

@Zoe7 I ended up having a break, wasn't much but it was something. I did read all of your post and I'm not too sure what to say. Thanks for the advice I guess. I do try asking people if they need space or moving onto another thread or doing something off the forums, but I just get bored and decide to come back, or check my notifications, or whatever.

Sorry for the way I was is all I can say I guess. I suppose it's over now, so I guess we'll move on

Just wanted to give you all a bit of an update today.

@Zoe7 @Former-Member @Blep @outlander @Bezak482 @NatureLover @Escaped_Goat

@Pollyotter @Shaz51 @chibam @Purplerain and if there's anyone else here.

I was supposed to see that rude MH Nurse today. I didn't bother calling or going, because i don't want anything more to do with him, and I told my Psychiatrist this when I spoke to him last.

I was supposed to see him at 1pm today. He calls at 1:13pm, we didn't answer. Then calls at 1:18pm, we didn't answer again. Calls again at 1:57pm, we didn't answer either. Then calls at 2pm, we didn't answer. Left a message saying he's trying to get through to me and to call the place. I blocked the number that he gave me. I hope he doesn't keep calling, it said "no caller ID" on it and I knew it would be him.

So this has annoyed me and I feel like he's harrassing me, I hope he doesn't call my Psychiatrist because that would just ruin his day and he's probably busy. If he does I'll apologise because he's done that behind my back.

The last time this rude MH Nurse gave me stupid childish homework like "at school I was proud when.." "my life story", just stuff for little kids really and I'm 20.

Ugh. I haven't made a complaint yet but I think I should.

@Zoe7 @Former-Member @Blep @outlander @Bezak482 @NatureLover @Escaped_Goat

@Pollyotter @Shaz51 @chibam @Purplerain

I'm not sure if any of you got a notification for my above comment so I tried again.

PS - @Blep I promise I'll read what you tagged me in sometime tonight, I'm so sorry I haven't yet

I think you should follow through on that complaint sweetie. Today he could have been a little worried about you. Sending you my love @Former-Member

@Former-Member perhaps but he was just so rude to me and my Psychiatrist said don't see him again even though I don't want to anyway.

I hope he doesn't call my Psychiatrist because that would mean he's doing something else behind my back. But if he does I'll just say to my Psychiatrist "I'm so sorry, I didn't think he'd do that"

Thanks, sending you my love too. And yes I'm not sure what to do about the complaint xx