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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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@Zoe7 How you doing hun? How are your fur babies going?

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missing you more than I can even describe my love. You are always on my mind and I truly hope that we get to talk soon. I have been so worried about you. If you can find some time and feel ok to message I would like to k ow how you have been beautiful. Feeling lost and lonely without my BFF

@Former-Member

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@Lee82 Am getting there .... am getting there :)xxx

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@Lee82 💛🌻💛

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Fur babies are doing okay @Lee82 Cat is so far good with her chemo meds and seems to be doing really well. Another blood test next week to make sure everything is going okay still and then another ultrasound in a couple of months. It is all a lot but anything for her to be healthy, happy and still with us. Tobes is his usual snuggly self and is enjoying the warmer weather being able to go outside more (as long as I am there too lol).

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@Lee82 wrote:

You are always in my thoughts hun and hoping everyday is a little better for you ❤️


Thanks so much, @Lee82

Sending you gentle hugs and more

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Good morning friends, well it's wedding eve and the enormity of what is expected of me tomorrow is getting to me now. I don't know if I am mentally capable of being what they need 😔 I have been super busy with last minute changes to the handmade items I have done for the bride and groom, struggling with finding a cake topper has been a real pain in the rear and last night I ended up just making one. I am not really happy with it but it will have to do. We have to leave soon amd we are ataying in a hotel for the night because it's a 6:30 start in the morning 😔 I have a 50th to go

to tomorrow night as well, I know I don't have to go and the birthday girl will understand if I don't go but I feel like I should make an effort as this lady has been so very supportive since last December it a small request to say thank you for that in my eyes.

Missing my forum friends and family so much but I am taking care of me the best I can.

Mel, there are no words to describe how I feel about how little I "see" you right now. But I know this won't last forever and we will be both back here talking to each other amd the rest of our forum family amd friends. Missing you so much that I am driving everyone here crazy with "Beautiful in my eyes". Love you 3000 @Lee82

@Bunniekins @Lee82 @Emelia8 @NatureLover @Zoe7 @Schitzo @Anastasia @outlander @Shaz51 @Maggie @MDT

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@Former-Member 💞💞💞

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@Former-Member 💖👰🎊💍💌💐

@Lee82 🌺

Emelia 🌷

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@Former-Member I hope everything goes well with the wedding tomorrow. It is very thoughtful of you to go the 50th birthday party even though you don't feel all that well, please take care 💚🌼 xx

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