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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Love you too Mel.

Look after yourself hunny, we are fine @Former-Member xxx

In response to: Darkness

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@Former-Member

Hi Dizzyizzy,

I just have to say your art room chair is just Fabulous!! Perfect amount of sparkle!

WIP

In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I am so sorry hun things are not good for you at the moment. I wish there was more I could do for you hun.
I am holding your hand sitting with you beautiful

Love you so much and giving you a hug. ❤️
@Former-Member

In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

That is fantastic news hun. I am so happy for the both of you. 😁

@Anastasia 💐🎂🎁🎈🎉🎉

In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member 🧡💛💙

In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Former-MemberHey sweetheart thinking of you. Take good care of yourself. Love pea.

ps: will try and be on tomorrow if you are around.xxx

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Thank you all for your support, you guys are truly the best. I feel like a complete idiot, it's just a word but it's one now that I can handle seeing or saying. If you missed it, I was in a session with my counsellor when I saw a word on one of her books that caused me to have a panic attack. I had never notice the breakdown of the word before, I have seen the same book on her shelf for months, I use to use the word a lot and it is mentioned here kind of regularly. I find myself stressing about weather or I will read that here and I can't control my anxiety about it. I haven't slept probably or at least my normal since Tuesday and I am tried oh so very tried. It's kind of a up give feeling because every time I think I am making progress I fall apart and the falling apart bit is getting bad again. So tried of waking up and having the day be the same or worse then the one before. I feel like the worse friend in the world, please know I think of you all often even when I am not here.

@Lee82 @Bunniekins @outlander @Anastasia @Zoe7 @Eve7 @Emelia8

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

One of the things about being here @Former-Member is there is always someone that can 'pick up the pieces' when some fall away for a period of time. It is like any family - when one feels lost another steps up to help out. So never feel that you not being here is anything more than you taking care of you the best way you know how. When you are here you have support and that you can take into the times you are not if it helps you get through ...it certianly does for me.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Hey @Former-Member,

I'm really sorry to see that you are struggling, Jaydes littles are driving her crazy, they have been clingy and needy....

just remember we are here for you

love you princess

~Ella~

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member Oh sweety dont apologise. Just please look after yourself. We all love you DizzyIzzy. Please take care. Love pea.

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