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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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Re: Darkness

@Former-Member That’s a lovely list of names and thoughts.

I hope you have some light in your day today. Lots of 💕💕☕️☕️🌺🥀🌹🌷💐🌸🌼🌻🌞🌝🍄🍁🍂

In response to: Darkness

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@Former-Member Hey sweety hope you are not being washed away by the rain wherever you are Stay warm and toasty and have a beautiful day. Your friend always peaxxx

In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Completely understood why you had to step away hun. I did have the wonderful help of @outlander and @Naturelover.
I didn't get much sleep last night and the monster visited me a couple times last night. feeling very anxious today and on edge. I'm very sensitive to touch and jumpy. I have no idea why. So tired of feeling like this.

how you feeling today beautiful?
@Former-Member

In response to: Darkness

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Good morning @NatureLover (mmm seems to be happening to me too now) hopefully you get the notification hun. Hope you got some sleep last night and I hope today is another good day for you.

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Thank you for understanding the why, it still wasn't easy to leave my best friend when she needed someone the most though.

Sensitive to touch and jumpy... what is the first thing you think about when you think about an "event" for me it's how "their" touch felt so when I am in a heightened state touch = pain, as for being jumpy I am expecting to be hurt every second of every moment I am in a heightened stated. It sucks and I hate it as much as you my love. I also get being tried of all of "this" because I am as well, sorry the monster visited you last night. 😞

Well if I answered you question about me with the first thing to popped into my head you would go mad at me. 😂😂😂 I am not great Mel, crash and burn is unavoidable at this stage and that means more meds, more side effects, more therapy and more mornings waking not wanting to be alive.

Sending you all my love and huge hugs my precious friend. Love you too infinity and beyond @Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

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Thanks for your tags and attempts at tags, @Lee82 and @Former-Member ... Thinking of you both lots as you cope with pain and FBs and panic attacks. Hoping for some good things in your days today - if possible...Sending gentle hugs to you both.

In response to: Darkness

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Morning @Former-Member

Hoping today goes well for you hun 💛💜

In response to: Re: Darkness

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Your explanation of why I feel sensitive and jumpy makes complete sense. Thank you for explaining it that way too me babe. I get so confused and frustrated. My jaw is so damn sore. Feels like someone has punched me in the face.
I am so sorry you are having such a rough time right now hun. It really isn't fair. Sending you a gentle hug although I wish I could give it to you irl.
I will be thinking of you all day. Love you unconditionally my beautiful friend 🦋💕

@Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Thank you so much for your ongoing support @NatureLover . I hope you have a good day today hun.

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