Tough Times

If it helps at all @Former-Member She is curently offline and hopefully that means that after her panic attack she is very tired and is sleeping.

@Former-Member I am going to need to try to sleep for a while Hon - do you think you could try to also?

I know @Zoe7 , two things keep me from sleep right now,1) I had been asked by my gp to take my night meds earlier to see if that would shake the morning haze a bit quicker and I did but I fell asleep on the lounge and d2 woke me up and startled me no getting back to sleep after that although it was only 40ish minutes that is enough to keep me going for a while.

2) @Lee82 , I just deleted a long are post. I just turn off until I know she is ok. I let one friend down in that way and she is now gone. The fear of losing another is just to great.

Thank you for everything @Zoe7 I will lay down and see but nothing likely sorry. 💖

I do really understand your concern for @Lee82 here @Former-Member but it is really important for you to know that you have not let anyone down - not now and not before. Each one of us in this world are responsible for ourselves and sometimes that pain is so great that we cannot see any way out. I know this first hand and believe me when I say nothing or no-one would have changed my mind - I am still here because of luck not design. Life is very different for me now but there are still times I wish that I was not here - so I totally get that pain, that loneliness and that dark, dark place. But you are in no way responsible for what someone else does or does not do - please hear that Hon. I know that does not alleviate your concern tonight nor change the pain of the past but you can never blame yourself for anything anyone else does. If we had a magic wand to change all the hurt in this world then we would - but we don't and we have to live just as much for ourselves as others because when it comes down to it it is only ourselves that we can live with and we have to be okay to do that so we can be here for others when they need it.

@Zoe7 , i have no words (that's a first)

Simply thank you

haha @Former-Member I have rendered you speechless - now my work here is done lol

Lay down Hon and see if you can at least get some rest and maybe a few minutes shut eye along the way. I will check in with you and @Lee82 in the morning - and hope you have both slept at least a little. Tonight is hard Hon but nothing we can't work through - especially when we have all the facts - breathe Hon and try to relax a little. Catch you in the morning

I will try @Zoe7 💜

Love you 3000 @Lee82