Any diagnosed germophobes or hoarders on this forum?

Oh dear @NatureLover maybe you could stream a movie instead? There might be something free from SBS, or docos from ABC.

Good luck. I'm off to the supermarket and pharmacy, else I'd have to open a pack of UHT milk.

Not sure why this hasn't come up before! I don't like watching movies or TV. I don't own a TV and find movies disturbing. I enter into the story too deeply. I can be disturbed by the movie for months afterwards. In fact, I've walked out of movies at cinemas before.

But you weren't to know all that!

What I really need to do is to get energised / motivated by chores or projects and ignore the coughing, I think.

I hope you enjoy your walk to the supermarket and pharmacy (if you're walking?). It will be nice to have fresh milk rather than UHT.

Thanks for the chat this morning.

Yes @NatureLover if I shop locally that's my walk for the day.

I do hope you managed to do what you wanted without coughing too much.

I'm intrigued re your attitude to TV and movies. As I'm the same! I've not walked out of any movies but have seen very few. I have wondered if it compounds my lack of social skills and have sometimes thought I should perhaps make an effort to stream on my tablet but haven't. The last movie I saw was before Covid! It followed some real people on the Camino de Santiago.

I still yearn to read but am blocked by something. Allowing myself the time and commandeering the recliner from the cat would be a start. I skim papers when I'm tidying. And I read a lot of current affairs on my phone. But I have hundreds - no, thousands - of books. It's a bit pathetic. Maybe I could ask the psychologist if I continue with her. I need help to get more done during the day too.

Interesting that you feel the same way about TV and movies, @Dimity ! I think that we are unusual and out of sync with most people in that (you mentioned social skills - I think it's more not being able to relate to movie and TV references).

I'm glad you do have shops that you can walk to - I was unsure.

I think it's a good idea to ask your psychologist re your block with reading. Although I am a bit concerned as you said "if" you continue with her. What might stop you continuing with her?

I didn't achieve much yesterday. Today I need to go to the library (with a mask on) for more library books and to return books. Plus the supermarket. It's nice to be able to look forward to going out.

I'm happy to finally be on page 555 of my thread.

Hoping we both have a successful day today.

Your thread was already quite long when I joined ( @Shaz51 tagged me in). You've done well @NatureLover .

I feel uncomfortable about psychology and counselling... several people weren't much help over 8 or 9 years. The mess of trying to initiate family therapy recently has left me muddled. So there's the counsellor I've seen for a year, who's helped a bit. There's the psychologist I've seen for a couple of months, who I thought might help with family therapy but couldn't, and has been proactive in suggesting therapy for me. And the family therapist who we haven't seen yet and possibly never will. I need to decide who to continue with. And it's very expensive. I won't get another MHCP until 2027 due to the counsellor's paperwork mistakes, and my health insurance is very limited re mh support. But largely through SANE I have a much better understanding of where I've come from, and the possibility of recovery with the right supports. Meds are important but learning to adapt and move on could be life-changing.

Hope you enjoyed your trip to the library and got some better books.

I'm expecting a busy and possibly difficult day tomorrow. 3 events, and hopefully I won't need an emergency trip to the vet as well.

My visitor didn't come in, just picked up the garden stuff they'd asked for. They saw the garden and I commented on the effort I was putting in. They were OK with it. I have quite a few things in flower .

The psychologist thinks it will be easier for me to deal with the house and family issues if I have the EMDR she recommends.

@NatureLover

I'm glad your visitor didn't come in and didn't sound critical, @Dimity . Was the minibus in time?

And how was your exercise group? (I think it was exercise and not craft, yesterday?)

Thanks for explaining how you feel about therapy. Very sorry to hear that through no fault of your own, you can't get another MHCP till 2027 😥 I wish the counsellor could fix their mistake!

Did you need an energency trip to the vet? It doesn't sound like Tiger is very well 😥

I didn't make it to the library (again). House is looking shocking. I hope to try again for the library today. But I did enjoy my day at work yesterday.

How do you feel about the EMDR?

@NatureLover hope you're OK. Sending good wellness vibes so you can get to the library. It's understandable tge house has lapsed but you'll get back to it.

Yes I feared Tiger was unwell tgecday before but he came good and didn't need the vet.

I didn't risk the minibus home and got a taxi straight to my appointment which was wise as the timing was tight. The exercise group was good thanks.

The EMDR would be a big emotional and financial commitment and would raise distressing memories. I wonder if I should be investing in the future instead of reimagining the past. The psychologist thinks the EMDR would free me to move forwards. I'll think about it.

Hi @Dimity , thanks for your good wellness vibes, I really appreciate them. Hoping to make it out today to the library, the chemist for more cough medicine and the supermarket.

I'm glad Tiger came good - phew.

Really glad to hear you enjoyed your exercise group. 🙂

I realised overnight the answer to your question. You asked what made the difference in keeping my house neat for 2.5 months. I realised it was because I kept inviting people round! Once I stopped doing that, the house got messy.

Re the EMDR, as I understand it, any therapy that looks to the past is designed to free us up to move forward. At least, that's how it worked for me. (Not that I've done EMDR.) And I hear you that it would be costly and distressing. Good luck making the decision.

Hoping we both have a successful day today.

Hi @NatureLover I hope the cough has eased and you've been out for books and necessities.

Yes I can see how having visitors would have kept you on your toes. Would you consider trying to see people more often in future?

I've ground to a halt. I guess I could claim rest days but that would make them seem purposeful. I've been tired and a bit wobbly when walking. I feel a bit lost. I had a look at the EMDR preparation - which I don't yet know how to do on my tablet - and found it quite daunting. I'll have to be in the right headspace to confront it all. It's too much for me at present.

Summer solstice is coming up. It's very sad I've made no progress in the last cycle. Staying afloat was all I could do.

Do you have any plans for the weekend? I'll need to think about changing some eating habits after seeing a dietician today. I'll try to go back to writing out daily schedules.