It is wise to have trust issues @Faith-and-Hope after what has happened, we’re not supposed to forget. And yes, there is a hurdle to blocking him out of your life entirely which is very frustrating. No contact is the only way to get over somone, but you dont have that choice.
Your ex not being physically violent has upped your chances of never seeing him again….eventually. If he was aggressive and threatened to destroy you, literally, like my father, you would never have got away until he was dead, or you were dead. And no one would have found out until after the fact because they have no friends and therefore the whole house is socially isolated because they manipulate your biology which you have no choice over, it is reflexive, especially for women because we can be so easily over powered.
It will be a slow and arduous process Faith No More but in 3/5/7/10 years time you will be a different person. I was a different person after freeing myself from his perverse living hell. It’s sickening to come to terms with it all in therapy and unravelling the brainwashing is soul destroying. Your mind goes to a very dark place at times, but you can create a life of your own once you know they're gone forever and can’t hurt you ever again. Stay off social media as much as you can, these types thrive on posting their new life on social media in an attempt to make you jealous and keep you immobilised in the past. He may have dumped you and the kids physically, but he still craves control over your emotions and the money.
Eventually once all the heat, anger and frustration dies down and you’ve got some security you will have to face the heartbreak. Because he has broken your heart, that’s a different sort of pain to realising you’ve been living with supreme A-hole for 30years.
He is a pathetic person.
C.
