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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It's wonderful you have mother and daughter things planned, @Bunniekins. And another generation in your maternal line, your own mother coming too. I talked to my mum on the phone after 11pm tonight. I knew she'd be up, lol.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita It is so pretty watching the lights dance around with the tide. The restaurant is ordinary but the location is to die for particularly at night. I love the bush but I also love the city at night with all the lights on looks beautiful do't you think?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hahaha! Lol that is late @Mazarita my mother would k _ _ _ me if I rang her at that hour onbly because she would think something was wrong and she doesn't sleep (so she probably would be awakereally so we could talk).

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes, the city is beautiful at night, and from a distance it's like a thing out of a fairytale, @Bunniekins. There's a distant view of the main city here from the beach. It often looks like a weird mirage.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Beautiful @Mazarita. It is strange I get a comfort of having alot of people around like in a city compared to being in the country where there are so few people kind of freaks me out and yet I need my space too. Do you know what I mean?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I think maybe I have been drawn to live where I do because it's kind of compromise between city and nature for me. Big enough to feel like there is some safety in numbers and also health infrastructure for my needs. But on the edge of the vast ocean. I like seeing the horizon, @Bunniekins, but I guess I like the city comforts too.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita it is very windy here. It must be snowing on the alps. Will wait till day light to walk. Is too dangerous to walk right now I think.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm really glad to hear you say that, @Bunniekins

I wouldn't walk at dark myself but felt it wasn't for me to infringe on your freedom. I also know it's tricky with me when people tell me what to do or not do. I'm just as likely to rebel by reflex and do more of the thing they were trying to keep me safe from, lol.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Maz the wise woman of the village 🙂 I always listen to people's advice and you and Sophia1 were right. It is too dark and I have to be sensible and you know what things have not changed for women since Anita Cobby it is still the same unfortunately so I have to use my smarts.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita If you could have seen me strolling through some of the rougher areas where I live .... in the middle of the night totally manic ..... I probably looked like a wild cat which is what saved me lol.

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