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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I've never been into spells @Mazarita. I firmly believe in 'Thou shalt do as thy will and no harm'. LOL about touch wood ... because of my name IRL I touch my head when I say that! And I've been known to throw a pinch of salt over my left shoulder if I spill it. But I'm a mixed bag - kind of do those things as a joke - have always walked under ladders!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I like the no harm part, @eth, and the other part too when softened with that. At the same time, I don't think anyone gets through life without harming others, even unintentionally, in small ways, or large. Even just hurting each other's feelings seems a form of harm, and that seem impossible to avoid all the time. I find it interesting philosophically to ponder these things. At the same time, I agree with the general principle of being free while avoiding doing harm.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita The thing about being free is that you have to let everyone else be free too (my adult child has yet to do this with me) and lots do harm. Like F'n Trump for example. I do believe there is real evil in the world, however so it's a quandry to know when to put the principle into practice and when to resist another's freedom - if this makes any sense.

Wow we're off to a philosophical start today!

Do you have plans?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It does make sense, @eth. And yes philosophy in the morning is a bit rare, but interesting! I can see how your political beliefs and your belief in freedom gives rise to further questions. I used to be much more politically active than I am now. I'm not sure how I feel about my relative passivity these days. The reasons for it are complex, and, as with a lot of my philosophical trains of thought, I find my mind unravels when it gets to a certain degree of complexity. And then I just want to be without thinking about it.

No plans here. Another day with the blinds drawn so far. Enjoying my feral state of being, though I probably 'shouldn't'.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Don't should on yourself @Mazarita! I'm having a pj day today too.

I used to be a bit of an activist for a few causes, one in particular. But since one of the assaults I've been through (a story you probably already know) I am not prepared to be on the front line any more. I'm more of a lounge chair on-line activist these days and I'm not sure that makes a difference. So I support causes without speaking out. I sense real risk in that (speaking out) these days. But I'm very proud of the work my brother does. He's a nationally recognized expert on certain topics (more detail could identify us) and is frequently in the media. And trains community organizers and campaigners. So he keeps me a lot more aware than I used to be.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, yes, you are right. Today I'm practising my freedom!

I too sense that speaking out brings a lot more risk these days than it used to when I was younger. The state of the world is so fascistic, with pretty open corruption everywhere. It's pretty mind boggling. When I was younger, I always believed the world would be better than it was then. Instead I see that it has got a lot worse in many ways. That's my darker world perspective coming out. It's great that bro is positively active and that you are more informed because of your closeness to him.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm free today too @Mazarita only the dog is here til at least 6 tonight. I'm going to cook a lentil and potato pie later for dinner for all tonight.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth @Mazarita @outlander @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope

Its morning still, (just) and am I proud! Coffee made, and seated in lounge at computer, showered and dressed. Its a rare enough event for me to make a fuss over it.

Interesting to hear of your wiccan/pagan sensibilities eth &maz. I never went there beyond being polite. I suspect my parents religious excesses made me deeply wary. I wanted classroom clarity with peer reviewed and evidence based findings.

Sure we can share carrots or pots of gold. Its more fun with friends anyway.

Glad there are some pluses in life.

Have a good day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

A good day to you too @Appleblossom. Good on you for this morning's achievements.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, @Appleblossom, better go offline now. C has come back from the shops and is chatty. Gotta make the most of it, since we spend a lot of quiet time on our own computers. Hope today unfolds really well for both of you. Maybe catch you later today.

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