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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you for the hugs @Mazarita 🙂

So hard when depression is taking over, not to sleep, and it seems to be such a rotten cycle. Really feeling with you with it. Depression lingers for me and I don't do well with it at all. I think I run better with supercharged anxiety, though that tends to lead to the crashy depressive stuff if it goes for too long. Grrr to it all sometimes!

It's great that you're going to try to get to art group today and see your friend. Not feeling good head wise makes that stuff really difficult and adding yuk physical feelings too would make me feel even less like I am up for it. I hope for you that you can rise, though understanding how much that's a challenge.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, need to have a shower this morning too, which feels like a bit of a hill to climb at this point. But will probably do it a bit later. May get a bit more sleep before waking properly around 8. I am getting into emotional trouble at the moment if I stay awake for too long. But the distraction of seeing a friend and art group will probably help me today. I hope so anyway.

I know what you mean about being more productive when anxious. Pity that it seems to lead too often to a crash, when we just can't sustain it. Wouldn't it be good if we could find a better balance. We do our best though.

Has it started getting light where you are now? The sun hasn't risen yet here but the light and birds are definitely with me, in a blue early morning glow.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Really understanding the relationship between sleep and emotional trouble also @Mazarita. It's another difficult balance thing it seems, but one that it doesn't matter how hard I try, I can't get sleep sorted sometimes. So annoying.

Often it seems worth it to do the rise thing when it feels so much like it's too hard or not what I want to do. It's not unusual for me to be glad I pushed through, though sometimes it really isn't something I can do. Either way, as you say, we really are doing our best and that's worth remembering.

The sky here is changing quickly now. Out the front is the low yellow of the sun coming up, above me has that beautiful blue glow, and looking at the back it is still very dark with some stars. Streetlights are very much still on. This is probably my favourite time to watch the morning happen 😊

Better start getting the little crew up. So nice to catch you this morning. I've missed you.

Big hugs for today and looking forward to hearing how you got on ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Great to catch you too this morning, @CheerBear. I miss our early morning chats too, when we are taken up with other concerns. But understand too for both of us how it's not always the way that we are here at the same time. Thanks for your kind words, they mean a lot. May your day flow smoothly and easily today.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning everyone @eth @Mazarita @Bunniekins @Appleblossom @CheerBear @utopia @Shaz51 and all here too

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander Good morning outlander :). Good morning also to @Mazarita@CheerBear@eth@utopia@Sophia1 and all who pass wishing everyone a wonderful day today xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @eth, @outlander, @Bunniekins and everyone,

Good vibes to you all this morning.

Just woke after another very long sleep (with short breaks as usual). Gotta get some things done this morning, in preparation for a friend and art group today.

Wondering how everyone is this morning and what, if any, plans for the day. ox

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @Mazarita im going abit better today.no real plans however im painting this morning.im trying out fluid art. Looks cool and want to give it ago.
R u feeling abit better today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander, so good to hear you sounding a bit better this morning. Great to hear you trying out something new with your art too. I don't know what fluid art is, but sounds interesting. A good plan for today.

Physically I'm a bit better than I was earlier this morning and better than I was mentally today than yesterday. All small gains, but they count. Thanks for asking. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita @CheerBear @Bunniekins @outlander @utopia @Appleblossom@Shaz51 @Sophia1 and all here today. Hoping the morning is kind to you all.

@Mazarita I hope you manage to achieve your goals today and that your visitor is good company. Hoping that the day lifts your spirits.

So funny yesterday about us all meeting up - the water savers! I did have a shower and wash my hair and feel better for it today.

My support worker seems not to have looked at her diary by the message she just sent me. I wonder what will unfold. It'd be nice to count on them looking at their diary given the number of times I go over my appointments with them.

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