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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I cant wait to leave. Im trying so hard not to be rude and talk but im struggling with it @Mazarita @CheerBear

@Former-Member familie good but loud. Dinner was rice and a slow cooked thing as it was bring your own sort of thing so just had abit of that.


Was really awkward cause i didnt come with mum and when i turned up a few strange looks and said we werent expecting anyone else ( as in me)


In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Poor Claire @outlander,

Awkward is well . . . awkward, but I'm hoping it doesn't become unpleasant. If you weren't expected, how did you find out about it? Not that that matters, . . . if you turned up here, I'd give you a look of shock & it would be the most wonderful surprise

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, my friend is happy with the new place, but a bit overwhelmed by the task of unpacking at the moment. Steady as she goes, 'slow and steady wins the race' etc. She's saying this kind of thing to herself, and others have been saying it as well. I wonder what the next project will be for you.

@Former-Member, cool you are getting back into some domestics, but most of all appreciating the beauty of where you are.

It was a bit hot during the day at my friend's place, not like where you are, Niqua, but still I started dripping out on the back patio. Just before leaving, C and I went for a walk that starts across the road. It went through beautiful stands of trees and expanses of grass, with a big pond with lily pads, waterfowl, magpie geese, ducks. It's a long bike path that I want to find out where it goes. It's possible I might be able to walk there from here as a nature walk some time. It would be a huge challenge because it's quite a distance. I'd have to wear runners, something I rarely do in this climate. But maybe in winter, as a goal for wellbeing.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Mum told me about it @Former-Member
Id rather just go home and ice my finger. Its too hard to cope as it is right now.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Mazy @Mazarita, I'm still getting mid to high 30's through the day but just down the road got 42.2 the other day, glad I'm not that far in! A new walk! Yes please! Did you notice if it had any seats along the way, so you could rest a bit during the journey? My joints have been a little more uncomfortable, I've stopped taking the anti-inflammatories as the Doctor kept raving on about tests & how they can damage the kidneys. I asked what do you do if it's affecting the kidneys, she said change it to every second day to lower the dose. I decided to stop entirely, I'm taking a little extra Painkillers & if it starts to get really uncomfortable, she did give me 3 more scripts & I will take them.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Did you bring your own car Claire @outlander ? If the meal is over, can you politely Thank everyone for everything & explain you have a headache? Your mind is racing, most people see thoughts being made in the head - so your head is hurting. Although, even though it's awkward, it may be a distraction to stay?

Love to you Claire

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

They are still eating dinner. Its second course now @Former-Member im trying so hard not to be rude at all. Mums ready to go but het bf is still eating too.
I dont know what to do. Ive got to go to th medical centre tomorrow as i think ive broken my finger as well

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

How did you beak your finger Claire @outlander ?!!!

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Possibly... i cant tell as it might just be bruised badly but i dont know @Former-Member i had hold of a horsr and she was being a cow and she kept breaking my ropes and i got my hand caught as i was untangling the rope from the tying rail and she pulled back again before i could get it

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Ah . . . Oooowww! Claire @outlander. I think that makes for a perfectly good reason to have to politely leave. It could give you something to talk about & an openly to politely take your leave?

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