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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks for the care, @eth. I didn't come in contact with his blood. He's someone who was homeless and she has taken him in and then got involved with him. He's on parole for assault etc. etc. I don't want to have anything to do with him and I may tell her at some point (though that's tricky because she might tell him). The one good thing he's doing for her is feeding her. She was eating literally nothing before she went into detox. She's lost massive weight and has been very unstable since breaking up with her long term boyfriend about six months ago.

My actual birthday though, spent with C and our closest friend, was wonderful.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Just popping out for a ciggie in the dawn twilight just beginning. BRB

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm back @Mazarita and glad to hear your actual special day was a nice one. What do you have planned for today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, today: GP, pap smear, B12 shot, letting her know I have now been clearly diagnosed bipolar 1. In the evening, the arty event.

What about you today, @eth?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita PhaMs person here at 9am. To the chemist with her and then a sit-down to go through my diary and sort my needs vs her availability. And I just remembered we already discussed some of this earlier, sorry.

I have noticed your posts about your new knowledge of your diagnosis. As you know, I have bipolar 1 myself and would be happy to talk about it any time. Does your psychiatrist not report directly to your GP?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That's okay, @eth. You are going through a lot at the moment and, besides, it's easy to forget what we've been writing here.

My psychiatrist writes letters to my GP but only occasionally. As far as I'm aware, there has been no other communication between any of my support people, other than what I pass on to them myself. I know this is not the most ideal situation, but I've found that the 'ideal' communication between treating team rarely exists. Perhaps if I was on a community mental health order and had a case manager it might be different. But I don't want or need that.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I wouldn't want that either @Mazarita

And multi-tasking doesn't help with short-term memory! Typical of me going racey at the moment.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, I think I may head back to bed now to try to get a bit more sleep before my big day and night. Thanks for the chat. Take it as easy as you can with the grief and hypomania and I hope your day goes very well. Talk again soon. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Another monologue...

Well, I've decided to bite the bullet and go see another psychologist. Just made the appointment with my GP for the mental health care plan. Waiting now on a confirmed appointment time with the new psychologist.

It's been over a year since I last saw a psychologist. Before that it was about a year of seeing two different ones. I didn't really connect with either of those psychologists and actually found the therapy unhelpful and unnecessarily distressing in some ways. To give them the benefit of the doubt, I will say that I might have been helped, but it's difficult to identify in what ways. Perhaps the first psychologist gave me some helpful strategies in my struggle with smoking, but that is still an ongoing problem even after 10 sessions to try to help me with it.

Some of you already may be aware that I've long felt I've been helped a lot more by psychiatrists in my life than psychologists. Nonetheless, I'm willing to try again with psychology, mainly because my psychiatrist actually recommended I do it at our last session.

My GP recommended one but for various reasons I don't think she's a good match for me. So I have done as much 'cold' research as I am able to do via google, phone calls and emails. After considering about five different psychologists, I have chosen one who is within easy reach of my local area (I don't drive), and bulk bills pensioners. Her modalities are Emotion Focussed Therapy, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. The first is a new therapy to me so maybe it will have better results than I've had in the past, though I know little about it aside from what I've read on google.

In my last session with the psychiatrist, the areas of focus we identified are my guilt/shame issues from past experiences, and my problems with basic self care. I really hope I am able to make some breakthroughs in these areas, and perhaps others too. And so... a new adventure in the quest for better mental health begins!

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

New adventures can be so scary but so rewarding @Mazarita. I remember you saying that you've found working with a psychiatrist more helpful than a psychologist in the past. Up until recently, I've had the opposite experience, and have found benefit from working with my psychologist.

It's so hard to tell who is going to be a good fit, but it sounds like you've given it a good chance with the research. Aside from coming across Emotion Focused Therapy in my studies, I haven't had experience with it. I think I may have written an assignment on it a while ago, but I would have to refresh my memory with Google. The Happiness Trap is an ACT book I have flicked through when I've been up to it that's also sparked my interest. I'll be really interested in following how you get on with your new adventure! I hope it's a really positive one for you 🙂

Great stuff Mazarita!
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