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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

There is one good thing @Bunniekins, My BIL can not sit still for long so it will be a flying visit

My sil would love to stay longer xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 I have this visual of Mr Shaz with his foot up on a chair grumbling away at the prospect of the visit and you trying to reassure him it will only be fleeting lol. Husbands can be so funny.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Ha Ha @Bunniekins you are nearly right my friend

My mr shaz does not grumble away, he goes very quiet and yes I try to reassure him it is only for a little while

and BIL always brings Beer

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 Beer .... I have never been one for beer ever unles that is I have been extremely hot but these days of course it is just coffee and water so there you go. My life is full of unhealthy dont dont drink alcohol, dont smoke, dont eat unhealthy food ... which is all great and I do feel so much better for all of that but jeez Louise gp is turning into a saint.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I will have one beer @Bunniekins, but it is no good for my kidney disease and they say beer is no good for mr shaz ,

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 Would a glass or two of red wine be better? If so you could suggest it some how ... like 'This beer is really not good for Mr Shaz and I we hope you dont mind if we dont drink it?!' and then maybe they will ask something like 'Oh sorry what should we bring?'

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

good idea @Bunniekins, My SIL likes red wine

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 yes but can you drink it or not? I cannot drink it anymore makes me sick ... even a glass makes me ill. It is no good if you and Mr Shaz cannot drink it too.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I can have a glass of wine now and then , mr shaz does not like wine @Bunniekins

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 what does Mr Shaz drink? tea. My ex hubby drinks alot of tea as he is a country boy at heart.

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