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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

You were a massage therapist for 28odd years @eth . wow , would love you to help with my sciatica

Hello @Mazarita, @Former-Member, @Former-Member how is everyone this afternoon xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Was @Shaz51, was ... it's been a few years since I did it professionally and these days rarely even get asked by family and friends as they know I have my own health needs to prioritise. But I'm happy to suggest stuff on here in a general way. You might like to read the suggestions I gave Mohill about sciatica a few posts back.

Hope your infection is clearing up.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

thank you @eth i will

and my infection is all cleared up hoping it won`t come back for a while

How are you today

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

A bit better than I have been thanks @Shaz51 but then an extra cup of coffee goes a long way with bipolar! Glad to hear you're feeling better.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Shaz51, I've been cleaning all day for the flat inspection tomorrow. So I'm sweaty and a bit exasperated by what I still seem to have left to do. But will be okay. How are you today, scotirish sister?

@eth, hectic by my standards, well yes, it has been that way today (though not by 'normal' standards). The flat is getting closer to be finished and I am really very pleased with what I've done. But there's still more to do and I'm pretty sure I'll be up at 6am tomorrow doing last minute jobs too, as usual. The trouble is, when I start the cleaning a week before the inspection, this small flat keeps getting messed up in the everyday flow of things and jobs need to be redone during the week. Usually I am way behind the eight ball on even basic cleaning really, so that's also meant that the jobs I've needed to do have had to be done with more effort to get them okay again. But, yes, there is a bit of obsessive perfectionism that has entered into things too.

Anyway, I'm taking a break now because I'm sweaty and really a bit had it with cleaning just now. So here I am. Glad to read that today has been better for both of you than recent days.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I will have another cuppa with you @eth

I have done nothing this afternoon -- oops

cleaned other peoples house this morning for 4 hours

way to go my scotirish sister @Mazarita, take a nice break will be good xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sounds like it's time for some time out @Mazarita good on you for putting the effort in.

Coming right up @Shaz51! Cuppa for you too @Mazarita?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Mostly, I've been drinking water today to replenish fluids from the sweating. It's not like I'm doing heavy lifting or anything, just simple things get me sweating these days (ah menopause, ah medications). Anyway, I'm confident it will be alright tomorrow by the time I (and C, who is doing the floors tonight), have finished.

So now, yes, I'd love to have a coffee with @Shaz51 and @eth

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita @Shaz51 My big achievement for today is doing my washing and washing my dishes. Doesn't sound like much but I've put both off for too long recently. It's amazing how little time they actually take to do once I'm onto it. Also paid my phone bill and bought a rain jacket online. MacPac and Mountain Warehouse are having sales at the moment if you need anything - huge discounts. I could easily go into a spending spree but am cautious about that these days - only get things I really need and usually on sale price.

It's really nice to have more energy today - it's been a difficult couple of weeks as you know already.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Great that you have some more energy today, @eth, and that you got those chores done. Cool that you have bought some needed items on discount. Where do you buy Mountain Warehouse, from ebay? I have bought stuff from them in the past and found it good quality.

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