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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Been pretty flat lately @outlander but at least I'll get out with my support worker this afternoon, even if half the time we have is the psychologist.

How are you going?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

sorry to hear that @eth i hope that your psych appt goes well for you though and its helpful. its good youve got a support worker too esp after a session with a psych.
im abit all over the place atm, but am trying to get myself sorted out. im trying to find a new psychologist, the one i wanted to see is on maternity leave so cant see her for at least another yr.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Best of luck finding a new one @outlander

To be honest after I see the psychologist I'd rather just come home and process the work we do than be out and about with the support worker but I only get 4 hours a week so have to make the most of it. With the psychologist we are still mapping the traumatic events/periods of my life. Last time knocked me down a lot as it was followed by the anniversary of losing my son.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

oh thats fair enough, well you have 3 hrs remaining after the session so hopefully you can get out and about with her or even debrief in the car instead of going home? @eth

i havent heard of mapping events, that might happen during my therapy sessions but sometimes i think some truamas and events are best left in the past and working on the ones your comfortable with.

im sorry about your son, sending lots of hugs

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander She's too inexperienced and conservative (positively straight) to 'get' what I've been through for me to debrief with her. I've found many events can only remain in the past for so long. Eventually they need to be processed, especially since I seem to be locked in complex PTSD. Mapping traumas is part of preparing for the EMDR (rapid eye movement) therapy.

I only have 2 hours left as they take transport time out of my hours. And even those 2 hours have more transport time within them.

It's better than nothing and I'm glad I have it (PHaMs) but more hours or me becoming able to be independent with mobility/transport would make a huge difference to my life.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

oh ok thats fair enough @eth yes i guess your right with ptsd, eventually the need to be dealt with but sometimes theres a right and wrong time too. by the sounds of it your ready and willing to give it ago despite the difficulty of it. i have heard of EMDR but havent done it before, so will be interested in hearing how you get along with it. im glad you do have support though it sucks they take your hrs out of transport time. is there a way they could help you become a little more independent?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

They are meant to be helping me work towards my goals @outlander but that isn't really happening. I have just told the organization about this on a feedback form. I'm going to give it to the support worker instead of posting so she might read it and adjust the way she is working with me. I hope!

What are you up to today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hmm they dont really sound like they are helping with your goals then @eth i hope they take on your advice and help you in the ways that you need.

im doing mostly stuff at home today, hopefully finding a psychologist and trying to get to the beach for a sunset walk. i do have to go out pretty soon though so will be logging out in about 15 minutes to get a few things done

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Have a good day @outlander and I hope you make it to the beach.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

you too and good luck at your appt @eth

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