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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51, you will get to talking to the GP when you can.

@eth, thanks, I am fully intending to go. Fingers crossed all goes well when the time comes.

@catgirl, good to hear from you again. Thanks so much for your good wishes on the screening. It's more of a gallery space than a cinema screening, will probably be a small audience, but happy with that. Hope you enjoy the lavender washing idea.

@Former-Member, it's really good to hear that you are getting some support in the 'really real', from people you know. It's not surprising that you are cycling through different emotions at this time. I totally understand your choice to keep mental health issues from most people. Hope the evening is kind and gentle to you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I will try my scotirish sister @Mazarita, learning from the topic tuesday tonight about carers burnout and how carers always put themselves last

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sounds like good lessons to be learned there, @Shaz51.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Morning Mazy @Mazarita, Claire @outlander, @Faith-and-Hope , @Shaz51 , @eth and Everyone 🙂

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @Former-Member and everyone ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander@Mazarita@Former-Member@Shaz51@Former-Member@eth good morning and a special congrats to Mazarita on the video that is fantastic. You should be very proud of yourself. Wish we all could see it.xx:)

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @Bunniekins 👋

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander Good luck with the gp today. Have you got a list of things to talk about with her?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita @Former-Member @Bunniekins @Shaz51 @outlander @catgirl @Former-Member @Teej hoping your days are all starting off peacefully. You too @Teej.

@Former-Member Your feeling of being a pressure cooker is well said. And no wonder. I can understand not wanting to talk about your diagnosis much with others. How long is it before you see your specialist next? Meanwhile I hope you're able to be gentle with yourself as you adjust to the news. You've been on my mind and I wish there was some way I could help but supporting you here will have to do.

@Shaz51 I was thinking about carer fatigue and the need for self care for you after yesterday's post about your Mum and Hubby. As they say, we need to look after ourselves in order to care for others. Sounds like it was a timely Topic Tuesday. I was a carer at home and at work for 18 years, at work for 28 years, and eventually developed 'compassion fatigue'. It's worth googling if you want to know more about it. I now have a tatoo I designed that means I have to look after myself first - but I am single and my aging Mum lives in another state as does my legally blind adult child. I really feel for you too.

Hi @Mazarita I saw your mention of bipolar being degenerative on another thread. I'd like to hear more about that if you want to share your thoughts. Enjoy your art class.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Former-Member Hi mohill we dont know each other very well but from what I have read you are going through a hell of a time just wishing you luck and best wishes. gp

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