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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @CheerBear, glad you've got a quiet day after such a hot and sleepless night. I've had a few hours, thank goodness, and don't feel hyper at this point of the day. It is going to be a big day here by my standards. Hope your day is easy going and restful.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Mazarita. Hope your big day goes ok for you ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita and @CheerBear thanks for your kind wishes and support. Hoping you both get through the day ok after little sleep. No plans for me today other than washing done and put away.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @eth. Yes, it is little sleep. I am probably going to my friend's place for at least a few hours today to help her finish some of her packing. C will probably pick me up from there on his way home from work. Then we both need showers. Then we are driving about an hour to visit friends at the other end of the coast. The drive will be challenging for me. Hopefully I'll be able to keep my mouth shut and not make any noise about my fear. It makes driving edgy for C, which is the last thing I want, lol. He is a good driver too, and very experienced at it. Having supper with friends there and then back another hour home. I think I might be pretty tired by that time. How did you sleep?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning everyone 💜

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Mazarita I had 5 short sleeps overnight - would have liked to sleep longer this morning but wasn't able to. On a trip like you describe I just do my best to remember to breath long and slowly and sometimes even sit on my hands or keep them clasped in my lap. Not phantom braking is harder to control but less visible to the driver. Hope you have a peaceful tiime with your friend today and an enjoyable time tonight.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks, @eth. I will remember what you suggest. 5 short sleeps is a bit too fragmented. Cool that you have nothing too pressing after that. How is the weather where you are this morning? It's shaping up to be about 30 again today, a nice breeze coming through the open doorway. I may manage a short nap before my friend rings me or I ring her. Getting together around lunchtime seems about right I think. Neither of us have much stamina and it's hot at her place. We'll just do what we can and take breaks as needed. Always feels good to get the washing done. I know there's a whole lot more of it for you right now. ox

Good morning, @outlander. Seems like you might be lacking a bit of sleep too. We were chatting pretty late last night. Any plans for today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @outlander how are you today?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yeh i logged off at 2am @Mazarita but didnt sleep well been up since 6am watching big bang theory.
Ive got my youngest sister over today but we are having a movie day cause its hot as here already. Other than that no plans
I seen your visiting your friend today or could be. I hope you can


Hey @eth im shoving feelings down atm. Not sure if im ready to face them or not yet.
How are you?
What are your plans?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita @outlander It's not too hot now, probably late 20s, but it feels like it might get a lot hotter later. On the hot days I don't open the side double doors (2 of them) as the breeze gets hot too. I just use the fan and have the front door open. On the really hot days I end up in the big house as it stays much cooler. The insulation in the cabin is good but the flip side of that is that once it gets really hot it can take hours to cool down.

Still observing the skin thing to see if it improves today so I can go to the farm tomorrow. And still smoking more than I should. The stress yesterday meant I smoked more last night. I want to stop by New Year and am running out of days to cut down in advance. I've told the others of my goal so now I'm accountable.

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