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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita

The zoo was great to give me another outside home activity while my son lived here. He liked me being out. With Covid, zoo closed and I came up against how uncomfortable I was in my own home and with him gone, to learning to reclaim my space. Painting and moving into his old bedroom project has been stalled since his last episode. I need to get that done before I go back to the zoo, butr am being gentle with myself about it. Then I had my "episode." Feeling like now is time to figure out all the emotional entanglements, so researching and reflecting.

A Wetland can be nice, the one behind my sons has a fair amount of activity. Glad you have C for driving and walks. It is great to have your overseas memories. You must have needed the rest on your return, but mood crashes are difficult. Good luck with gp plan ...

Take Care

@Bow @eth @Emelia8 @Bow and all reading along ...

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth online now if you are up for a chat. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Appleblossom

Glad you now have less of that feeling of being very uncomfortable in your own home (except in a crisis time for your son, I'm guessing). Gentle going with other matters seems wise.

Read on the other thread your comments about Facebook blocking us from seeing or sharing Australian and international news. I was surprised it upset me this morning, angry at the power and ruthlessness of the social media giants, FB and Google. Blurrily cynical about why the government is doing this really, seems to be mostly of benefit to news media giants to get royalties on their articles. I'm not on either side but it amazes me to see these tactics by FB and Google that involve holding a whole nations population to ransom.

Hope you have an easy night.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Mazarita

you too re good night.

I have been wary all along, as my son deliverately took me to see the Social Network when it first came out. I like the pictorial aspect of fb and shared lots and connected well. I have been using other browsers like opera or ecosia .... not to play into the whole monopoly thingummy.

It is very hot here and I have one mini walk to the geurilla garden to go. Someone eft lots mulch and other person left succulents, so thats 2 others "involved"

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom I like hearing that there are two others getting into the feral garden. Donation of mulch and succulents, a kind of plant I like a lot. There is a little long oblong pot of different ones on my balcony, made by a friend, a special little garden to me. I bought it from her when she was working at a nursery and going through enormous grief. She was healing herself with gardening and still loves it.

I am deeply hooked in to/by Google services and Facebook. I started with them both almost when they were just beginning. I used Mozilla Firefox browser for quite a while, also their Thunderbird desktop email program. Because I use so many other Google services I ended up coming back when Firefox caused me some tech problems. The Social Network was interesting for getting an idea of some of what happened 'behind the scenes'.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Watching funny moments with Elon Musk now. @Mazarita I like that he approves of the universal income. He also seems slightly aspie so that resonates.

I knew a lot of sciencey tek people and was that a bit myself, but after marriage break up and seeing my son's dependence, have developed stronger anti tek attitude.

I knew and felt and suffered from the issues behind the scenes with ex IT husband. Google and Apple were rising stars and fb not yet born. I like to keep that level of perspective and detachment re tek. I realise many people do not agree with me. In last 5 years I have allowed myself the luxury of entertainment and mental health connecting. Maybe its a hunch in me about long term benefits being better than short term gain.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom I was less impressed with Elon Musk when he put a lot of pressure on to stop the California lockdowns. He is obviously a visionary and yes I can see your Aspie observation. If a universal basic income was enough to live on it would be great. The perceptions about the level of income that could be various. Good if he is giving a laugh though.

My creativity since 2007 has been completely tied up with tech. In a way it always was, even when film-making was celluloid. I also was very interested in the box brownie camera I had aged around 7, and a later modern flash camera that was passed on to me for my 10th birthday (a woeful day except for cakes and the camera that no-one else could get working but me, hehe). Not sure where the early tech interest came from except my dad had apparently taken lots of amazing rodeo shots that were all lost somewhere along the line. A cousin left Australia to work at Microsoft in Seattle. As far as I know he doesn't even have a uni degree.

I totally get why some people prefer a less tech life and recognise it as possibly a better balance. I am a prime example of the inside lifestyle, and the addiction that can happen. I've always been indoorsy though, even when it was books and dolls as an only child greatly afraid by the world. Still, there are amazingly good things about engaging in tech world as well.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Appleblossom it's just after midnight here. If you feel like a wee live chat, it looks like we are online at the same time.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Love to @Mazarita

I wont last long but here we are in the wee hours ... again!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom sorry, slow here. How has your evening been? Feels nice talking to you in later hours again.

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