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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It's good to see you either way though my friend @eth 🙂

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry to hear that @Adge Have you thought of registering with Hireup, Mabel or Includa to be a support worker? Your years in aged care would be good experience plus I think you've studied too ...? Cert 3 or 4 are very helpful in finding clients on those platforms. Plus lived experience as a peer is helpful too.

Hi @Shaz51 @Emelia8 @Faith-and-Hope @MDT

Thanks for your kind words @Emelia8 Yes there are particular people I've known here for a long time, but I'm sure those friendships will endure, as will yours and mine. Wishing you a smooth recovery from all you've been through in recent times. xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth Thanks.

I'm registered with Programmed Integrated Workforce - that took many hours of paperwork & safety induction videos etc.

If I get a position through them- ,then I would actually be paid through them.

Not paid by whoever I was actually working for.

So far I've not got any work through them yet.

There was the Water Metre Reading Job - That required 20 Km of walking on Foot in the heat every day.

They advised me that it was very strenuous - They actually advised me to not take that position.

Even though it was through them.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth

We had a fire in our house on Thursday

We are staying at mum's

She was in hospital but now she is home again as I am at the house

Our place is not liveable,

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Soooo sorry to hear that @Shaz51 . Hopefully you have been able to salvage or save some of your possessions and important papers. Glad to hear you are safe.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth , Thank you for the update. I'm glad you are settling into your new place. The area you live in sounds wonderful, I'm happy that everything has worked out well for you. All the best with the new job 🍀 xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth It all sounds perfect. I like the way things are falling into place for you. It helps with any doubts of whether it was the right thing to do. Definitely sounds right.

The beach so close is such a gift. No doubt you will be sending time there, when you get some time that is.

The possibility of work sounds great to. Life is moving in the right direction. Enjoy. 💕

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 sorry to read about the fire, I am really sorry to hear it , but glad you and Mr Shaz are safe xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I've been absent over the last weeks - life has been constantly busy since I moved to my new place. Some of it not so good, admin and account type stuff to be sorted, some things repeatedly, but lots of it really positive. I've had more visitors here than over the 4 years at my brother's place. Everyone says how lucky I am and that I couldn't have done better considering it's public housing. I've settled in more easily than I anticipated and have also been seeing a bit more of my support workers which has been good. I'm going away Tuesday for a week and will then be away for a couple of weeks in January too, so won't be around much at all for a while. Heading to Brisbane next week to stay with my sister and see my Mum and nephews, then have a camping trip planned with my old mate from Darwin in January, which I'm really looking forward to. The one who eventually said he should never have let me go. Will be a fun holiday and who knows where it will lead to?

I want to thank @MDT @Zoe7 @Angels333 @Shaz51 @Adge @Bunniekins @Former-Member for your tags over the last little while and send hope that you are all smooth sailing at the moment, that Christmas is what you hope for and that the New Year is healthy, fruitful and satisfying for all here.

Shoutouts and sending these wishes also to @Maggie @Emelia8 @CheerBear @Appleblossom @Teej @outlander @Faith-and-Hope @Judi9877 @Anastasia @TAB @Owlunar @frog @Exoplanet @Sans911 @Snowie @NatureLover @Dadcaringalone @Molliex @BlueBay @Jacques @Former-Member @Meowmy @Schitzo @Jupiter @Former-Member @Silenus @Former-Member and many many more I'm familiar with. I know I've missed a lot of people here but since I've not been here much for a month now I can't find my long list of lovely people.

Look forward to catching up with you all sooner or later - I'm not leaving the forums for anything, just not here most of the time any more, as I was for a long time.

Take care and stay safe everyone xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Its so good to hear from you @eth ... and even better to hear all your very positive news.

You have settled in really well to your new accommodation, and there is no doubt at all that you deserve such great digs. Its wonderful that you are able to visit your Mum, sister and nenphews in QLD next week. How good is it that the state borders are finally pretty much open again? And I am also thrilled to hear that you are catching up with your good friend from Darwin in January. It sounds wonderful ... and yeah, who knows ... perhaps you can rekindle what once was, or what once could have been? How silly was he to have let you go! We all need someone in our lives ... someone to share good times, and bad, with. Human beings were designed to be social creatures by nature, to have 'a mate'. But it has to be the right 'mate', and should never undermine our own sense of self. But of course you know all this ... having been through very bad relationships in the past. Anyway ... I am very happy for you. It sounds as though you are thriving. I'm sure not everything is perfect ... but a lot of things are falling nicely into place for you. Yay you .. none more deserving than you @eth ... to have some good fortune in your life at last.

Emelia 😊💞

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