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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Morning Mazy @Mazarita, Claire @outlander, @PeppiPatty, @eth, @CheerBear and Everyone

I've already got that feeling like it wasn't real, it's kind of frustrating, like having your lollipop snatched away. But I took pictures, I even took one of the sign {I think I do that to prove to myself I really was there} My aches aren't big enough to have gone away, to have spent days packing - what a thing to be complaining about . . . I don't have enough pain. I'm tired, and yet I haven't been able to get to sleep until after Pumpkin hour, at least I've woken a little later today 🙂 I know I'm tired because I'm feeling cranky, but my body doesn't match up with it? I've got today and tomorrow to fix up the packing, seems the load up top wasn't as secure as I thought, nothing dramatic, I lost the top off the esky - and the top of the margarine, but the tub was still there 🙂

I do have moments of feeling free when I'm camping PeppiPatty, there are times when it feels like a fog has lifted and I can finally see, and during those times everything feels lighter, like a weight is taken off of me. I think it's because the places I go, there's no lights or buildings, there's often a road but normally just 1 - I escape us, Human Beings. Mother Nature just seems to soothe me, comfort me like well . . . a Mother. She's so much calmer, I don't have to run flat out just to try and keep up. She's a frail and fragile creature and I love her, I try everything I can not to harm her while she's giving me her trust.

I always take so much more rubbish with me than I make, and yet I can never pick it all up. I can never understand how people can do that, 1 disrespect Mother Nature, 2 disrespect the council, organization, whoever had the forethought to reserve that little pocket of nature and allow people to visit it. And I can never understand why, just put that rubbish in a bag - it's not hard! As for the mangled, scarred trees - there must be some brain-dead stupid people out there, don't they know green wood doesn't burn that well! I saw 1 firepit that had been made at the base of a tree!?! I know it takes quite a blaze to ignite an established tree, but I wonder if they know, or care, that that tree still burns, and the burnt area on it dies - all so they can toast their marshmallows - which they could have done just as easily a few feet away from the tree!

Love to all that need or want it

(and all love is gratefully accepted 😄 )

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Former-Member it's great to hear how you care for the places you go to. I always think 'leave it as you find it or better' is a good policy. Some people just don't care for nature. So stupid to light a fire at the base of a tree. Yay for your feeling of freedom out there.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, how is your weekend going?

Hi Niqua, thanks for the lovely kingfisher pics and another rave. I too am incredulous at people lighting a fire near the base of a tree. I'm thinking your aches being less than usual is down to your growing 'camping fitness'. You have been doing a fair bit of it this year. As with anything, it is likely to get a bit easier on the body the more you do it. Probably means you are getting fitter overall too. I had to laugh at you losing the top off the margarine tub (but the tub was still there, lol). Much love to you. @Former-Member

Hi @PeppiPatty, @CheerBear, @Shaz51, @outlander and everyone

I had my psychiatrist appointment today, and I got to talk to him about the psychologist suggesting I had avoidant personality disorder. 'No', said he, straight up. Then we talked about it further. He asked me a number of questions, took a whole lot of notes. I told him the aspects of the condition my life seems to relate to, but in the end he still disagreed. Mainly because I have had longish love relationships in my life, and am not nearly as withdrawn as would be typically associated with avoidant personality disorder. He also was averse to labelling me with a personality disorder in general. So, the next step is to talk in more depth about it with my psychologist on Wednesday. I'm not sure what happens when your psychologist (a clinical psychologist, so qualified to diagnose), and your psychiatrist disagree. We'll see. For now, I'm just not worrying about it too much until I can learn more on Wednesday.

Hope the evening is treating everyone okay.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hugs @Mazarita, @eth, @Former-Member, @CheerBear, @PeppiPatty

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @CheerBear.

You may be reading at the moment, catching up on forum news. I wonder if you are on the step with a coffee. Hope the new day is greeting you well.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita and all 🙂

Wondering you how you're getting on After your appointment yesterday Maz. I think I'd be feeling lots of different things if two people on my team, both with the qualifications to diagnose, disagreed on something like this. It would be a lot easier sometimes if there was a clear yes/no test or answer to things like this :S I'm interested in hearing how you get on with your psychologist appointment after yesterday's conversation.

I just got your tag above and I have coffee and am catching up on news 🙂 Mornings in the forum have become part of my routine.

Any plans for the day?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, catching up on sleep again is the first item on today's agenda. Only about 90 minutes sleep overnight, partly to do with just being too hot. Really want to get out walking on the beach today in the afternoon. May be at friend's place after that.

Do you have anything on today?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh wow that's not much sleep overnight @Mazarita. Heat and sleep don't seem to work very well together :S Were you working on your video?

We are doing the Santa photo thing today (hopefully). I've left it late and have a feeling the queue will be long and slow but I haven't been up for it until now. The kids are very excited about it. They're giving out their little gifts they've made for their classmates tomorrow so after that it will be finishing that off with them. Fun family stuff 🙂

Hope you get out for your walk and enjoy visiting you friend if you do 🙂 (and get to catch up on sleep)!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, it's so lovely imagining you with the fish. My heart is warmed by the stories you tell of them.

Yes, I was doing some video until about 3am, then mostly not sleeping until about 5. Then unreasonably awake again, as I kind of am now.

By the way, you are right that I'm mulling over in my mind how to address the differing of opinions with my psychologist on Wednesday. Seems to call for some diplomacy if possible, not always my strong suit. Blurt is my more usual mode.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That made me feel good inside to read, thanks @Mazarita 🙂 They'll be lots of sparkly jingling stuff and if they do what they've done for years, they'll be silly in the Santa chair which makes laugh. They don't do sit quietly and say cheese 😉

Not sleeping between 3-5 is a bit grrr! I woke at early 4 with a jolt of "I must get up and do all the things right now" and then sat upright in bed for a moment before telling myself that it was ridiculous and to shut up and go back to sleep. It actually worked this morning!

Blurt is probably what I would do too. That and mouth off about the problems with the DSM for thinking feeling human people with experiences that don't always fit in boxes 😛 I was thinking about it this morning and I think the good in it is that you've been given two sides and two perspectives. It seems like adding stuff to a bigger picture rather than taking a really narrow view. I suppose that could create confusion and uncertainty but there's something in it that feels a little more "whole" maybe. What matters the most is what you think and how you feel about it all though. Very tricky!

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