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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: anRe: A long rave

Hi to all here @Blep @Mazarita @Zoe7 @Maggie @Adge @Appleblossom @Former-Member @outlander and anyone I've missed (sorry!). and @Sans911 @Exoplanet @Former-Member @MDT @Jupiter thanks for your tags today and yesterday - still getting to your individual messages.

My housing application is finally completed and was lodged this morning. And I had my first outing with a support worker since mid-march this afternoon - a walk to a park via a cafe - celebrated with a hot choc with marshmallows and a brownie!

Hopefully now that it's off my plate I will be able to get back to being more supportive around the forums. I feel like I've been missing in action for weeks.

Tagging @Snowie @NatureLover @Jay-e @jem80 @Got_the_tshirt @WriterMelb @BPDSurvivor @Maggie @Judi9877 @Dadcaringalone @Hamsolo01 @outlander @Faith-and-Hope @CheerBear @frog @Teej @Shaz51 here too in case any of you want to tag me into discussions or your own threads.

Congratulations to all you new CGs for completing the trainings and now being fully-fledged CGs.

In response to: Re: anRe: A long rave

Re: anRe: A long rave

well done on finally getting the housing things sorted @eth
a hot chocolate and brownie sounds yummy!!

In response to: Re: anRe: A long rave

Re: anRe: A long rave

Having the housing stuff sorted must be a huge relief @eth - so well done for that Hon

In response to: Re: anRe: A long rave

Re: anRe: A long rave

Thankyou @Zoe7 and @outlander - might I see you on the The Weekly Friday Feast tonight? If not, hope it's a gentle and peaceful evening for you both. I'll be around tonight for a bit and then def tomorrow on the Saturday Soiree - all welcome!!

Take care xoxo

In response to: Re: anRe: A long rave

Re: anRe: A long rave

It will be very good to "see" you around @eth

I've been unable to post/ absent - for other reasons.

I'm glad you had your housing application accepted.

Yes that is definitely worth a Chocolate Brownie (& a Yahoo) in celebration...

Adge

In response to: Re: anRe: A long rave

Re: anRe: A long rave

Hey @Adge I've been following what's been going on for you lately. It was good to hear you are getting paperwork and $$ from your ex employer - and so they should! Did the issue about your remaining stitches from the procedure you had some time ago get resolved? Hope you're feeling well tonight. I'm over on the The Weekly Friday Feast if you want to jump in there.

In response to: Re: anRe: A long rave

Re: anRe: A long rave

A short Update:

I see the Surgeon (new Referral) next week - to see if he will operate.

To remove the internal stitches (sutures), that have been sticking out through my tummy (for 14 months) - since my last bowel/ hernia surgery.

Yes they do hurt - every day.

My GP Dr could not deal with it (he tried to).

Despite my Post-Grad qualifications & long working experience - I have tremendous trouble obtaining any new job (in recent years).

I just have not been able to keep pace with all the fancy software presentations & printing layouts - that are the only way to "Get across the Line" (Get an employer's attention) these days.

Plus right now is the highest unemployment rate in 25 to 30 years.

It is being vastly underestimated (under-reported), & is most likely 15% to 20% at least (I'm told).

My ex-employer has taken 3 & 1/2 weeks (since Dismissal).

They still have not produced (forwarded or posted) me my Redundancy Payslip.

Which needs to show gross pay, & tax taken out - for my Records, & for lodging my Tax Return.

They were so eager (fast) to Terminate 70 of us Disability Support workers - via email, all at once (on the same day).

Yet they have produced No necessary Paperwork (payslips) - despite my requests.

My Union's Unfair Dismissal Claim, on behalf of 70 ex-workers - has now been withdrawn (cancelled), due to a compromise.

That was stressful, & was drawing things out (& on).

So perhaps I can look & move forward (somewhat) now.

Yet legal documentation & due rights (eg my Payslip) are obviously not important to these people.

So how can I try to "move forward" (on) - when I still have to chase my ex-employer for basic necessities (like a Payslip)?

Adge

In response to: Re: anRe: A long rave

Re: anRe: A long rave

How frustrating for you @Adge re your ex employer and the case being dropped. Hope the surgeon can solve the tummy problem for you.

In response to: Re: anRe: A long rave

Re: anRe: A long rave

Thanks @eth The compromise of a Statement of Service, & a small amount of $ - was certainly better than nothing.

Fingers & Toes Crossed for my appointment with Surgeon - it cannot get any sorer (surely)?

I still have a Beanie & a Scarf - that I Knitted & Crocheted myself (in Primary School).

I wish I had not forgotten how to Knit & Crochet...

I did not have to resort to Baked Beans (got a little creative) - Cooked up dried Lentils, added tinned diced tomato, then a tin of tuna.

Tastes good.

Adge

In response to: Re: anRe: A long rave

Re: anRe: A long rave

Hey @Adge I didn't crochet for many years and forgot the stitches - so I watched some Youtube clips to learn them again. They are there for knitting too. I started a beanie last night with t-shirt yarn that I made.

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