FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

24,681 - 24,690 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That article was a little bit me @Mazarita . 😂

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Saw that video a couple of days ago, @Teej, hilarious! I'm really appreciating humour about it all at this time!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Teej, recognised myself in it too, that's why I found it so funny. 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Absolutely @Mazarita . It's really great having you and @eth around. My life is much richer for the times we've shared. 💜😘🤗

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Definitely have shared more here than anywhere else by now @Mazarita @Teej And it feels really good to have some 'freely given friendships' when so much of my out in the world life is with support workers paid to be my companion. I have several very close friends here now ... I love that on the forums we have such a range of types of connection. And how safe we are with each other so much of the time. Can't say all the time unfortunately, so many different people here these days that occasionally there is a falling out. But it's always good to see those that have that experience find parts of the forums where they are still supported and welcome to share. I'm rambling ...

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, saw your post about having your resume done now. Congratulations! Just a couple of days earlier you seemed to feel a bit hopeless about presenting your experience in a way that looked good. Fabulous that it has turned out to be excellent, an anxiety off your mind and something to look forward to eventually.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

A good ramble though @eth 😊, much better than my dribble 😉. I think one of the most amazing parts of the forum is 'meeting' people you never would have in real life and striking up that connection and friendship whilst being able to be really vulnerable. For you and @Mazarita it must be about 5 years now. That's a pretty great friendship 😊

Im going to have to go and do some things for a bit. Hoping to jump on later, brain power permitting.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

See you around, @Teej. Hope your day goes well. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Wanted to say hi to @Former-Member as I 'saw' you there. Here's hoping everyone's day is ok too.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Mazarita it does feel good. I re-read it now and then and even just doing that boosts my sense of self-worth. The trick now is to get it to save in a format where I can edit it. It's funny because one of my skills mentioned is attention to detail and there are a couple of details that need changing! I use open office, a free program very like office suite (which is the one with 'word') and can't open word documents that other people send me in a view where I can edit. I think it's time to bite the bullet and purchase office suite. Had a look and I will need help to install it so waiting til sil has time to walk me through it or bro gets back.

What is helping you have good moments currently?

24,681 - 24,690 of 27,230