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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Shheese sounds tough @Exoplanet

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins I should add that I don't know how long I'll last coz I took a prn med.

Hi @Alacarte nice to meet you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth Nice to meet you too. I'm off to bed though. Family day today 😊👍🏻

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins my mum has always been described (even by herself) as eccentric and proud of it, but these days is positively dotty! I love that word - heard it the other day for the first time in yonks and it's perfect for her!

Hi @TAB how are you this morning?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry OOPS @Bunniekins I meant their Dad!

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Hey eth was just on youtube tarot readings my favourite site :). The kids are bitterly disappointed. I told my ex ysterday when he rang for the 5th time that they were really upset he apologised and is coming up this coming weekend but to be hoenst it doesnt make up for not being here at christmas. He just doesnt think and he should know better but his gf doesnt have kids so she wouldnt understand or care for that matter but he should.

Anyway my mum told him off lol when he went around to her place for dinner on friday. I just burst into tears on the phone yesterday.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth 'dotty' is nice. I like dotty :). My mum is critical and snobby lol .... and getting worse

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thinking of you and sending love @Bunniekins . So sorry you are having to deal with this at this time. I'd be very upset too. My kid's dad was largely absent for most of their teen years so I get what it's like.

I'm not going to last much longer - must try to sleep again or I'll be as fried as I've been the last couple of days. I had comitments 5 days last week and that's 2 more than usual. And also was waking much earlier and fed-up with trying to get back to sleep and only getting an hour here and there. I think prn has kicked in - it's the first time I've taken it as well as the new med pdoc has me on that's meant to help with sleep but hasn't yet and it's been 8 days. My body is feeling really restless in the muscles but my head is tiring.

Do remember to take care of you, especially during ex's visit. I hope it goes ok for you. Lots of love, strength and peace from me to you xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth sleep well eth. When you wake up let me know why the pdoc has changed your medications. Anyway. Will talk soon Love peaxxx

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Gosh, your meal sounded lovely. I certainly will look up the caponata recipe. Thanks for that info. 👍👍

Sorry about the no sleep, it’s a rough road. Looks like prn have kicked in. 😴😴😴

I hope this time with your mum doesn’t cause to much havoc. I like dotty, very descriptive.

Enjoy your rural drive. Always good for the soul. 💙💜

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