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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello Mazy @Mazarita, Claire @outlander and Everybody,

I am the ninth astrological sign and span the 240–270th degrees of the zodiac. The learned healer whose higher intelligence forms a bridge between Earth and Heaven. The sun transitioning between approximately November 23 and December 21. In association with Chiron, the "wisest and justest of all the centaurs". Known for his knowledge and skill with medicine and thus, was credited with the discovery of botany and pharmacy, the science of herbs and medicine.
Like satyrs, centaurs were notorious for being wild, lusty, overly indulgent drinkers and carousers, violent when intoxicated, and generally uncultured delinquents. Chiron, by contrast, was intelligent, civilized and kind, because he was not related directly to the other satyrs due to his parentage. He was the son of the Titan. A great healer, astrologer, and respected oracle, Chiron was said to be the first among centaurs and highly revered as a teacher and tutor.
As the son of Cronus he was immortal, so it was left to Heracles to arrange a bargain with Zeus to exchange Chiron's immortality for the life of Prometheus, who had been chained to a rock and left to die for his transgressions. Chiron was pierced with an arrow belonging to Heracles that had been treated with the blood of the Hydra. This had taken place during the visit of Heracles to the cave of Pholus on Mount Pelion.
Ironically, Chiron, the master of the healing arts, could not heal himself and willingly gave up his immortality. Chiron was made a promise by Zeus that as long as he was needed as a trainer of demigods, he will exist in this world. He lives on today as a constellation and an inspiration. The Greeks identified him as the constellation Centaurus.
I am Sagittarius, a Centaur armed with arrows, able to be violent or wise, brave or mild.

No need to be sorry for missing messages Claire, the absolute beauty of this Forum is that it's not compulsory; that and that it's a Forum not an 'instant chat' 🙂 I think people in general expect things a little too instant these days, I see this Forum as a place I can link-up with friends - have a line of communication. But it can be very intense, I've had to 'step back' a long way to find my 'comfort zone' 🙂 Sorry your struggling, but have no fear - your Forum Family will not loose sight of you! The planks still on the see-saw and it's pretty well settled with 1 end on solid ground 😉 I read something about my cyber-grandgirl burning her hand!?! . . . but don't know how you did it? I hope it's healing quickly and I hope things with your Family are going Ok?

Loads of love and support to you my magical Mazy. Sounds like your friends situation is coming into it's peak. Something will work out, the Universe will slot things into place - even if it seems messy and chaotic, something will happen. You are doing the best you can, your friend is lucky to have your support {that support is part of the Universe slotting things into place :)}
The weather sites have been promising rain here for weeks and for the next week to come too. We actually had rain last night, it was lovely 😄 Gentle and yet fairly steady for 10-20 mins. Then a soft, cool breeze with the scent of freshness, followed it 🙂 But, like your walks on the beach, it does limit which forest walks I'll choose 🙂 Unlike where you are though, the temperature here has been wonderful 🙂 Though I have gotten the evaporative air cooler out {I haven't used it a lot yet}, low to mid 30's and cooling off beautifully at night {though I haven't needed anything more than the sheet much}.

I think I might go into my little Take Aways store today and get the only gluten free feed they have to offer - steamed fish {with a side of chips} and take it to a local Weir for a picnic lunch 😄 Yep, that sounds like perfect Sunday entertainment to me 😄 I'd be tempted to go get some DVD's except I still can't get them to play . . . I must have another look for the external player . . .
I'm thinking of going into the 'big smoke' tomorrow and doing some shopping. It's much cheaper there and there's HEAPS more shops, like Bunnings, Aldi, Life-Line Superstores 😄 😉 😄 I'm particularly interested in a camping shop that has a sale on some really fancy fold-up chairs - they recline! That way I could have a comfy chair anywhere I went {including my Center :)}
Well, I think I've been 'raving on' long enough 😄
Wishing everyone a smile today 🙂
Niqua

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita @CheerBear thanks for the tags.

@Mazarita I'm very sorry to hear how things are going for your friend and their feelings because of the house hunt. I think it's a very good idea for you to be having a break today and hope you can remember your self-care as she gets closer to the date she has to move. Just sayin'!

@CheerBear your crafty day with your kids sounds delightful. I remember those times with my kid fondly.

I'm slightly improved with the fever having gone but the chest cough is very stubborn. Managed to get down to about 6 ciggies yesterday and am aiming for that or less again today. I have so many feelings about the whole smoking business and how ill I've become - shame, guilt, weakness of willpower, stupidity ....... and I really feel (and am reminded) how much my whole family feels about it. None of them smoke. It wouldn't be fair for any of them to have to care for someone with emphysema. Just hoping upon hope that this is bronchitis and not that.

Well today isn't going to be fun. On the news they said it was the bikies' Christmas run today which sounded harmless and in good spirit of charity. What they failed to mention was the bikies' Christmas party/music gig at a park near here. Which started with half an hour or so of full-on death metal at an outrageous volume at 10am. Apparently they usually have it at the beach, but that's still over-run with scaffolding etc from the supercars. So they have the same sound system at a local suburban park. Sil has tried to ring police, council and even the EPA about noise polution but none of them answered her call. It really is over the top loud, much louder than the recent festival held at the same park. Oh well, time to bunker down with windows and door shut. Not to mention all the revved up bikes in the area.

Looking forward to catching up with folk here after having no energy even to chat for the last few days.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Me too @eth very lacking in energy. Hope your feeling better today ❤❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander with the major changes in your home life lately I'm not surprised you've got not much energy. You've been pushing yourself (or being pushed) so hard for so long. Some down-time might actually be a good thing in some ways.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

yeah thats for sure @eth

still working alot too with 2 jobs, its not that much easier with being separate as i still have the kids a fair bit but not as much its forced them to step up to the roles more and allowed me to step back more which is a relief. still have high epectations of, nothing new though.

taking it easy today well sort of just more limiting hand use from the burn. i ended up sleeping 10hrs last night, i guess the shock of yesterday really wore me down nd being int he ED too.

what are you up to today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

good afternoon Niqua

thanks for the info on the zodiacs though im not sure what it means....is it your brithday Niqua?

i didnt miss the msgs, i just couldnt respond more than a like which upsets me alot. so yes apologises are neccessary for me.

im glad at least one end is stable, very good indeed! yes i did burn my hand. i was getting a pizz out of the oven and the tray slipped so i grabbed it with my bare hand to steady and ended up burning my hand from it and went to ED from the pain i was in. am semi ok now. slolwy getting there.

your day sounds very nice, will be looking forward to how you get on later today or tomorrow when your online next. i do love hearing of your adventures 🙂

@Former-Member

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Nothing much happening here @outlander. Have been watching TV for a couple of hours and now and earlier reading what I can find on the forums about smoking and MH and quitting. Keeping quietly occupied and focussed on not smoking. It's hard when I'm housebound and have no motivation for creative pursuits etc. Still very low energy and stubborn cough.

What are you up to?

I see you're around too @Mazarita - Hi how's your day going?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, I was up in the second half of the night into the morning and slept some more hours after that. Having a dishevelled day, taking it completely easy, putting no pressure on myself to do anything. Feeling okay chilling to the max. In fact I was almost about to fall back into bed for a while until I saw your post.

Your lurgy sounds a lot like the one I had not so long ago. The chest part of it was the real problem for me too and it took a while for that to pass. Try not to stress your mind about the long term too much about the smokes just now. It's good and enough for now that you are reducing intake.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

ahh yes i read about your health issues atm @eth and you trying to quit. not easy at all but doable, will be cheering you along, mistakes and all

ive still remnants of a cough from pneumonia too, thats finally almost gone.

yeah its hard, boredom lets the habits in, have you got a good movie or something to watch, colouring in or something?

atm im jsut listening to music and chatting ont he forums. i want to draw but lacking energy too

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

good afternoon @Mazarita

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