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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Goodnight @Bunniekins 😴

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @frog I don't think I have come across you before. Nice to meet you. I find these forums a good place to be safe and not have to hide our reality. Here is a place I know I am accepted for what I am and not judged.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

A Big Hi! and good morning to all the Long Ravers! @cutiepiekitty @Mazarita @outlander @Appleblossom @frog @eth @Angels333 @Adge and all who pass. Wishing everyone a super pea Thursday 😄 Lots of love peaxxx

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Adge just saw your message now. Hope you feel better today. I am Not good either. Hope the day turns out better for us all. Take care.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@saturnzoon hope you feel better soon. It must be so hard for you. Take care.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Morning @cutiepiekitty ,

I really hope today is a little more positive for you and that you are feeling better. I'm sorry about the panic attacks you have been having, that must be really diffucult. I'm not sure about the hangover, but, it makes a certain ammount of sense after going through trauma like that. I'm glad you are still here 🙂

Good Morning @eth , hope you have a nice day today. Not sure whats on the agenda for you. I'm at work and then will be doing a little bit of shopping this arvo. Heading to my farm tomorrow with a bit of luck 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning all

@saturnzoon really hoping that you can reach out to someone e.g. counsellor or psychologist for some help to 'unpack' what you are going thru' and find some peace about it all.

@Shaz51 @Appleblossom @Owlunar and anyone else with family separations - at one stage my only child and I (single parent) spent 5 years living in the next suburb from my sister and her 3 kids without ever seeing them. For a while I extended invitations but it hurt too much constantly being rejected so I stopped. I was also estranged from my mother for 15+ years. So I get it, how painful it can be. Even now that we are in contact again I have definite boundaries with them. But the children, now adults, have built bridges of their own and have good relationships these days. Not much I can say in the way of advice, but I'm hearing you all about the subject.

@Adge hope you had a lovely soup last night and a good chat with your neighbour. Hoping you have news of your brother's progress sometime soon.

@cutiepiekitty yes those hangovers after panic are a thing I've experienced too. My psychologist says it's due to body chemistry kicking in after being flooded with adrenalin. Parasympathetic system following sympathetic system - you might be interested to google them to know more.

Hi and good morning to you too @WillowMay @Meowmy @Bunniekins @outlander @Gazza75 @TAB @MDT @frog @Angels333 @Doglover @Former-Member @Molliex @Zoe7 @CheerBear @Faith-and-Hope @Teej and anyone else checking in here today.

Sending warm wishes and hoping today is one of the better ones for you good people, and that those needing support find it xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Gazza75 heading to your farm sounds good. I love getting away from town when I can. My bro and sil have shares in an 'intentional community' property about 2 hours from here up the Buckett's Way. Beautiful country. 2 rivers meet on their property. Such peace and quiet out there and sooooo many stars. Love a nice campfire. Have a lovely time.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth 🙂

Your spot on about the stars. Your retreat sounds heavenly 🙂

Do you get the chance to get out there much?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Morning @eth and thanks for tagging me

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