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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks for the encouragement @Zoe7 I did make a start and have what actually feels like a complete poem but it's really short. I am hoping to add a 2nd stanza but keep hitting a brick wall so far. It's about scars and my transgender adult child's recent surgery - I'm thinking the 2nd part could be about how it has affected me but just don't know how to put it into words yet.

Heading off to watch some telly now. Nice to catch up with you. Have a good sleep tonight. xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Goodluck with it @eth Maybe after some down time it will come to you. Rest up and see how it goes later

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, thanks for the tag. It's always nice to hear about your adventures. I hope you managed to put together the rest of your poem, or that it comes to you soon.. I was thinking about how out subconscious can bring all of our questions together and maybe that will happen here.

I too find myself in background mode somewhat these days. Life and work meandering along without much excitement. I am not complaining, boring and mundane is fine with me through the week at least ☕🌼🍀❤️❤️

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 am happy that your anxiety has decreased from the weekend :). I feel like I am getting myself together at long last. Getting my groove back :p. Have made some monumentous decisions over the past few days which I think are going to help me get my life together :).. So all good here.xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Here's to the pea getting her groove back @Bunniekins

Monumental decisions are certainly something Hon - hope it all leads to a better life for you

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 xxx:)

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins @Angels333 Thanks for asking.

My Br is still unresponsive. Yet they intend to reduce his sedation soon, & to remove his breathing tube.

If he is able to breathe okay by himself.

He is still in ICU (after 10 days), & will be for quite some time.

My brother will not receive any support or understanding from my other brothers - they seem determined to deny that this has even happened to him (& won't bear it's mention).

Even my Mum has made some harsh remarks about my brother's condition - she said that his disfigured appearance will not matter, because he is blind.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Adge Hey Adge what a nightmare for you. I can not even imagine what you are going through Adge :(. My heart goes out to you and your dear Br. You are both in my prayers. Love peaxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Hi Mazzy this is the hour we would have met up. I cannot sleep and the forum is quiet with the last of the all nighters trying to get a bit of shut eye :). I wonder how you are going. I have and am having alot of changes in my life. It is all a bit scary to be honest with you but I am putting on my big girls pants and going with it. I cannot stall and sit on my hands any longer and in a way it feels good gaining the courage to take some much needed steps forward.

So how have you been my dear friend? I hope all your videos are doing well. I tell you this I always had this visualization of you looking like a Colleen McCulloch type. Larger than life and full of intelligence and passion. Do you look like the writer I wonder? Wearing tie dyed t-shirts with your hair all wild and woolly? That is how I picture you Mazzy. My dear Mazzy. Your peaxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning to everyone and Hap-Pea Tuesday to all the Long Ravers @Mazarita @Adge @Zoe7 @Gazza75 @eth @Angels333 @Doglover @cutiepiekitty and all the others passing by. I am up with the vampires and the werewolves again :p. Who needs sleep when you have a keyboard and a mouse :P. Wishing you all a super day. Loads of love peaxx

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